PLEASE read i need help im scared

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2005
PLEASE read i need help im scared
6
Mon, 11-14-2005 - 9:52pm
im jessie im 17 and i have a beautiful daughter and i did have a great husband now hes leaving me ill be 18 soon and im so scared to lose him i know im young some say i never really loved him i am to young to love but i know in my heart that i love him im so scared lost confused every time i think im better it happens again im falling apart day by day i love him so much please reply to this i really need help from people who understand why does this have to happen its almost been a month since we seperated hes off having fun with all these neew girls when i cant even stomech the idea of moving on is this normal god i wish i new
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Mon, 11-14-2005 - 10:32pm

Hi, Jessie! I know you are absolutely heart-broken and sad, but it really is going to be OK. You'll need tome to grieve. So you have a counselor or therapist you can go see? How about your parents? Can they provide any type of emotional or financial support to you?

I think the first step you need to take is to schedule an appointment with a lawyer to make sure you and your child's interests are protected. Most of them offer free consultations.

And don't let anyone try to minimize your pain or feelings. People hurt at age 17, and they hurt at age 35. What you're feeling is real...it's a loss, and it hurts terribly. Please check back and let us know how you're doing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2005
Mon, 11-14-2005 - 11:41pm
when it hurts so bad i dont like it i want it to go away or him or the feeling or me im so scared god ialmost cant take it
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2005
Tue, 11-15-2005 - 11:50am

Hi Jessie,

I'm much older than you (52) but I know what you're talking about. I have had the same feelings, and it does get better over time. What also has helped me are my counselor, my attorney and my little "pharmaceutical friends" (Lexapro and Xanax) that were prescribed me by my doctor. I've heard someone call these drugs "the glue" that keeps your life together. They don't solve your problems, but they allow you to function in your daily life. Also my family has rallied round me and all kinds of people have stepped out of the woodwork to say they are my friends and supporters.

You have to let yourself feel your feelings, and take the time to grieve about this awful thing that has happened.

Come back and post here any time.

Barb S.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Tue, 11-15-2005 - 1:14pm

hugs and welcome jessie. i am so sorry for your pain. i know that you are feeling now like your life is over - I don't believe that there is

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2005
Tue, 12-27-2005 - 8:52pm

Hi Jessie

I was in your shoes when I was 20. I had a daughter and was blown away by her mother. Never thought I would find anyone like her. But I will say this. I did, and I sometimes look back and say, Damn, I wonder what it would have been like. But on the other hand. You CANNOT make him love you. Never try and draw anyone back with pity because it is a temporary thing. If you really love him, let him go. If he is really your man, he will come back and be better to you than ever before. Sure it's scary, but life is not over yet! Be strong. If you want to email me sometime, tmacdaddy75@hotmail.com.

Hang in there! Most importantly, pray, God is real and he listens and knows what is best.

Tom

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2005
Wed, 12-28-2005 - 6:26am

Yes!!!
Pray. The best advice I ever got was to be still and listen to God.

Jessie do you have a church? or family that can be with you?