Quick question for everyone...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Quick question for everyone...
10
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 9:05am

Hi guys,


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 10:26am
I don't know that my ex said it, but OW told several people that he didn't really want to marry me but felt he had to. Translation - I was ready to be married, didn't have a clue about OW, and he knew that if he didn't propose within the time frame I was looking for I wasn't just going to keep dating him for years. Since he didn't want to lose me, he married me to keep me rather than being honest.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 10:43am

Well... my EX didn't say that, but he did say that "you're the one that wanted the kids.... I didn't want anything to do with that" (he's since changed his mind... but I'm thinking when he said that "oh really?... and who was forcing you to have unprotected sex with me????")


That was along the time when he was whining that "but I gave you everything that you ever wanted"... and I said... "no, you gave me everything that you thought I wanted".


LOL.... Hadn't thought about that in a while.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 11:18am

I know, I agree too!


My X told OW that not only did I force him to marry me, but I forced him to get me pregnant with child number 2. Later on, he also told me himself that he thought I forced him into having kids at all.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 2:12pm
Mine said I forced him to date me. That was while we were married. God knows what he's saying now.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 2:17pm

Verrrrrrrrrrry interesting.


I wonder why this happens. It's never their fault, even a little. What's the point in making themselves out to be the victim when they chose things just as much as we did?


Ah yes the male mind....LOL!


THanks everyone for your response.

Avatar for eatatmoms
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 7:41pm

Well, he didn't exactly tell me I "forced" him, but he did say that we were together for a while

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 9:15pm
Mine didn't. He did say I forced him to buy our house. I almost laughed when he said that because it sounded like a joke, but he was serious. He said he had no choice because I wanted it so much, which is also funny because I asked him what he tought of buying a house, he agreed it was a good idea, and we picked it out together after many weeks of what appeared to be voluntary house hunting. The force was all in his head.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 9:33pm

I almost forgot about that! My ex and I were househunting TOGETHER less than 2 weeks before he left me. In fact we found one that we wanted to buy.... we were in negotiations with the realtor on that particular property....


funny........


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 9:40pm

My ex is passive-aggressive. He never took responsibility for any decision, and that gave him the right to complain and blame me if he later decided he didn't like the outcome.

The *real* reason he blamed me for buying the house is becuase he was in charge of paying the mortgage and he screwed that up, so he blamed me for buying the house in the first place.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 10:30pm

Seems to me I was just reading something about "blame".... oh, I know... it's a new Dwight Yoakam CD, title song "Blame The Vain"


.....(Don't you know that) Blame....
Is always never enough
It just keeps you in the game
Until you've only got yourself to bluff.........


.......I'll blame it all
On someone else
'Til there's nobody left
Then I'll just blame me


My SO is a huge Dwight Yoakam fan... so we got the new CD yesterday, and that song is on it.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~