Re: I ruined my marriage!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2012
Re: I ruined my marriage!!
Sun, 01-08-2012 - 8:07pm
I realize this is an older post but hopefully you guys will check it. Anyway I've been in a whirlwind on these boards since I discovered them a week ago. I have an incredibly long, complicated story but basically, I put up with a lot from H and this summer had an affair. As horrible as I feel (and I have had a difficult time with it) I agreed to MC and although my H seems to be genuinely changing for the better, and I cut out the AP, I'm still constantly fantasizing about life outside my marriage. We have 2 small children and I am terrified to hurt them but I cannot stop dreaming about the day I can be myself again. But the guilt will not go away. Where are you guys at in your M's and what has helped / hurt you?