Really really scared!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2004
Really really scared!
2
Thu, 01-04-2007 - 8:53am
I really need some support. I took my kids to the therapist on Mon. The therapist wants me to contact the attorney to try and have their visitation cut down with their Dad. We have already had a custody evaluation and he has lots of problems as documented by the evaluation. The evaluator said that although he can't parent he is a good playmate. I left for domestic violence and abuse. I have primary custody and make medical and educational decisions. My problem is that it seems whenever I go to court the Judge does not listen. She is more concerned with my ex's rights than what the experts are telling her. I feel that if my kids therapist is telling me to court I have to face my fear of the legal system again and try to protect my children. I am just so afraid the Judge won't listen and give him more time than he already has. He has never brought in any evidence to counter what the experts are saying. He just acuses me of all kinds of bizzare things that he has no proof of and the experts say are lies. I realize children need their fathers but what about when they are truly sick. Please don't suggest changing judges because according to the attorney that is looked on extemely unfavorably and in all liklihood will not be allowed anyway. Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2007
Thu, 01-04-2007 - 9:08am

WOW! That is a really tough one. How often are the vistations with him now? Is he violent with the kids? I'm not sure why the judge isn't listening. Is your lawyer presenting everything in the most effective "legal" way? Maybe you should do a little research on other similar cases and what evidence they were able to use to persuade the judge. I'm sure that you aren't the first (or the last) that will be going through this...

Keep your kids best interest in front of you and keep pushing forward! Good luck!!

s

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Thu, 01-04-2007 - 10:56am

Please jump over to the Recognizing Domestic Abuse board (Also under the relationship problems header) as there is tons of great help there. Women who have been abused are eligible for a court advocate (I could have the terminology wrong). But that would likely come in handy for you. Contact your local women's centre or someone on the other board can provide you with an 1-800 number. I think in your case that person would advocate on your behalf with repsect to the issue of his instability. Right now - to the court - this might just look like a bitter dispute, which is likley not uncommon. If you take it to that next step then the judge will have a hard time dismissing it and it iwll be on his/her head if your xhusband does something damaging.

Best of luck to you,

Rose
(hopefully I will see you on the other board!)

Rosecolouredspecs