remind me why calling him is the worst..

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
remind me why calling him is the worst..
7
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 4:15pm

thing I could do. I dont know why lately Ive been feeling kinda sorry for my ex when he was the one who disowned our son and blamed me for having to do it. Is this feeling normal. I find myself wondering if he's okay. And it does bother me that he's losing all this time with the baby. I know Im not 100% over him but the last two months of no contact have been good for me.

Funny thing is last summer he made a baby with the woman he cheated on me with, we had already broke up. He said it was because "I" was keeping our son from him, she got pregnant with twin gir0ls, he left and later said it was a mistake getting her pregnant. He thought we were through for good. But he then moved on to a 21yr old.

Well now here we are a year later and he's said it again that Im keeping our son from him and although he cant replace his first born son he can damn sure have another one and that's just what he will do. I can keep our son, he has his girls and he'll just deal with them. How can he say that. But yet he said the pregnancy was a mistake. He's told me he has so many regrets and so many things to be sorry for. I thought he was beginning to learn from his mistakes and then he comes out with this about our son. And here I am like a fool feeling sorry for him. It makes no sense. He's the one being a selfish jerk. Why do I feel sometimes like I should contact him and ask if he plans to truly stay out of our son's life forever. My son deserves a good father. How can he just walk away for our son like that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-02-2004
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 4:24pm
Lean closer to your computer so I can smack you in the head! Why on earth are you feeling sorry for this guy?!!? Him leaving you and your child and you cutting off contact with him were the best things that happened. He can't be trusted. He can't make up his mind. You don't need him. You deserve someone that is going to be there for you and who owns up to his responsiblities. That is not this man!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 4:26pm

If you want to call him because you miss him and you want to know how he's doing, don't.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 4:56pm
LOL, Thank you for the wake up call. I ve done really good the last 2 months until recently Ive had these dumb feelings. I just have to remember to be strong. Thanks again.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 4:58pm
It's a little bit of both. Me missing him really bothers me because I should be over him with all the garbage he put me through. I have decided not to call period. I know I will end up regretting it big time. He will only hurt me again. And its like you said, hes the only one keeping himself from his son.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Sat, 08-20-2005 - 12:52pm
<<<<




Funny thing is last summer he made a baby with the woman he cheated on me with, we had already broke up. He said it was because "I" was keeping our son from him, she got pregnant with twin gir0ls, he left and later said it was a mistake getting her pregnant. He thought we were through for good. But he then moved on to a 21yr old.


Well now here we are a year later and he's said it again that Im keeping our son from him and although he cant replace his first born son he can damn sure have another one and that's just what he will do. I can keep our son, he has his girls and he'll just deal with them. How can he say that. But yet he said the pregnancy was a mistake. He's told me he has so many regrets and so many things to be sorry for. I thought he was beginning to learn from his mistakes and then he comes out with this about our son. And here I am like a fool feeling sorry for him. It makes no sense. He's the one being a selfish jerk. Why do I feel sometimes like I should contact him and ask if he plans to truly stay out of our son's life forever. My son deserves a good father. How can he just walk away for our son like that.>>>>>


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2004
Sun, 08-21-2005 - 6:08pm
You're not a fool for feeling sorry for him, you're a human being with a heart. Does that mean you should call him? HECK NO!!!!!!! If I was close to you I'd kick you in the butt! I've been reading your posts through all of this and I am so proud of you for not contacting him. Just remember, HE disowned his son. Yes, your son does deserve a good father....anyone who would disown his son for ANY reason (even just b/c they were mad) is NOT a good father! YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR EX'S RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS SON! He has to take action, it is up to him and his decision alone. Yeah, he'll try to blame you for it, but that's just one more sign of his immaturity and his inability to be a good father to your son.
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Mon, 08-22-2005 - 11:25am
I just want to thank you guys for knocking me back into reality. As always all of your words have always been helpful and true. I love all of you.