Saw him...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Saw him...
3
Tue, 06-28-2005 - 11:17am

So I was getting mentally prepared that I may have to see OW & possibly my ex at a mutual friend's pre-wedding events soon. I haven't seen OW in over 2 years, and my ex in a year, so I knew it would be weird to see them again.

OW works near me - I haven't seen her, but sooner or later I was expecting I might. I didn't think about the fact that ex would likely be dropping by her work, especially since he likes to go for drives in the summer. He just drove by, saw me getting out of my car, honked, and kept going. I did a behind my head wave, and that was that.

I feel... weird. Not sad, exactly, or missing him or wanting him back (not a chance!) but a little nostalgic, I guess. Most of the good memories I do have were summer day trip related and he looked so much the same as he did when we were together. And I guess I'm feeling a little resurgence of the life's not fair feelings. He's the one mainly responsible for the divorce, but I'm the one who had to deal with so much and change her life, while things are the same for him as always, but he's swapped me for her. Which is really just a silly thing for me to think, because if he really has 'swapped me for her' it means she'll soon be out of the honeymoon phase of their relationship and he'll start showing her the nasty side of his personality. And I am glad I changed my life - I would never again want to be the shadow of myself I was when I was with him.

But I guess feelings don't always make sense, and in a way it's good that I saw him. Maybe getting these weird feelings out of the way now will help me stay cool and composed when I see them. If anything can get under his skin, it'll be the idea that he's not getting under my skin. Maybe that's why they say living well is the best revenge.

-sang

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
In reply to: sang_froid
Tue, 06-28-2005 - 12:38pm

Hey sang,


Hugs


I have this problem too sometimes....


Unfortunately we are the only ones that have to rearrange our entire lives to make up for what they did. It's hard and not easy to trasition, BUT, you have to know that living well IS the BEST revenge. We learn from our marriages, our ex's are still following the same path.


Hugs to you and CONGRATS for handeling that so well :)


Angelena

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2005
In reply to: sang_froid
Tue, 06-28-2005 - 3:56pm
You are handling yourself wonderfully! Hugs!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: sang_froid
Tue, 06-28-2005 - 11:10pm
Love the siggy.... and love it when Dr. Phil says..... "and how's that workin' for ya?"


Karen ~ wildlucky4me

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~