Scared to DEATH!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2004
Scared to DEATH!
5
Wed, 03-19-2008 - 11:55pm

The wheels are starting to fall off in every direction!


My kids are acting out, asking more questions but still

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2008
Thu, 03-20-2008 - 8:04am

I am so sorry that you are having to go through this. It is unfair of your stbx to accuse you of damaging your children - please don't take everything he says to heart. You are under no obligation to do what he wants you to do. You need to listen to and address your own needs. Research shows that it is conflict (not divorce per se) that causes most damage to children under these kind of situations. You need to be in a place where you can address the needs of your children (and yourself) above the needs/desires/dictates of your stbx. You are a strong person - stronger than you feel right now.

Please know you are not alone and you are in my thoughts,
~Hurtnlost

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2008
Thu, 03-20-2008 - 8:30am
I don't know the whole story but based on your words, I'll assume there is some sort of abuse in the household.

 

 

 

 

 

******************************************* “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2004
Thu, 03-20-2008 - 9:30am
Thank you for your reply! I feel I can not go forward ... it is way to scary and lonely. I will have so much on my shoulders in addition to the guilt he is laying on so thick. I started crying yesterday and can not stop. I know I need to pull it together but I am afraid he has finally broke me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2008
Thu, 03-20-2008 - 11:59am

Do you have a counselor?

 

 

 

 

 

******************************************* “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Thu, 03-20-2008 - 4:48pm

Take my advice...do NOT fall for his line. My ex tried the same line on me, too. He treated me terribly for majority of our 12-year relationship. When I FINALLY had the guts to leave, suddenly, it was my fault and I had, "ruined our family," never mind the fact he'd been neglectful and abusive (emotionally and financially) for 12 years. Just because you're the one to finally have the courage to pull the plug does not make you a monster.

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