Second thoughts on 50-50 custody

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2006
Second thoughts on 50-50 custody
5
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 4:25pm
I am no longer certain that I am willing to accept the Judges ruling. Having said that, I am not even sure I have any options. Can the judges ruling be appealed? Can I go back to mediation in hopes of getting a different mediator that might understand my reasons for opposition?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 4:31pm

I know in my state, PA, you have the right to appeal the mediators decision, but that also means your lawyer is going to get even richer as this drags on.


I see no reason that you could not appeal his decision if you don't agree with it..this is the rest of your life were talking about,,so if you have the financial

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2006
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 5:14pm

I would be doing it myself. I live in California....

I am just so freaked out right now and cannot find peace in the judges ruling. I want to, and I have tried so hard since Wednesday to reconcile it in my head that is is best for my boys, but I just can't.

I need to do something. If I am unable to then at least I will have followed my head and heart.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 5:25pm

Listen, 50/50 custody may work perfectly in some cases, but that doesn't necessarily mean that it's the right choice in the case of YOUR children. You obviously know them best.


I'm sure you can appeal. I would contact the court clerk and see what papers you need to file. However, I will tell you it is normally very difficult to have these rulings reversed. Also, remember, if it truly does not work out for your children, keep good records and document everything that goes on. That way, months down the road, you'll have evidence that the arrangement is not working for the kids....if that does end up being the case.


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2006
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 5:33pm

The mediators report reccommended trying it for 6 months. I did not agree and the judge basically said too bad.

I don't know what to do....

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2004
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 6:25pm

Is it that you feel the children will be harmed by 50/50? Or is it that you can't handle that much time away from them? If it is the latter then you have zero chance of winning in court.

A mediator looked at the situation and made a recommendation, a judge took a second look and came to the same conclusion. Unless you can offer some compelling evidence that 50/50 is not in the best interest of the kids then it will most likely stand.

You may be better off to spend the 6 month trial period in counseling so that you can come to terms with this change in your family. Sorry if I sound cold but courts are pretty cut and dry and it seems that the ruling has been made. You can either spend the time and energy figthing it or the time and energy helping your kids adjust. How easy of a time they have is dependent on how you prepare them for it.

You have said in previous posts that your ex is a good dad, why should he not get 50/50 with his kids?