Sep. and now H wants to reconcile...
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| Thu, 05-24-2007 - 9:31am |
...has any one here been through that phase in a break up? Did you go back to him? Did it work out for you?
In our situation there was no PA, he had an EA (it ended months ago), he's done it before and I'm fairly certain he'd do it again. Also he's immature (plays X-box and has 2 other "childish" hobbies I don't appreciate). He's very good to our DD and supportive of me the whole time we're apart (since before X-mas 06). We're amicable and on friendly terms now. I'm due to have a NB (his) in June 1 (just about a week from now). So I'm weighing the pros and cons of going back. His issue with me is trust - he doesn't like/want me on these type of internet forums airing our problems (I don't have friends or considerate family to ask advice from, and our MC last year failed for us).
I still feel like I have to improve myself, get a p/t job (instead of being a SAHM), also want a social life/recreational activity outside the home apart from H and the kids. I also am not attracted to H any more and don't want to fulfill my wifely duties with him any time soon. I'm enjoy having his stress and drama off my shoulders now.
What would you do in my situation?

I'de tell him to get lost, lol. You can do better!
Amanda
I wish it were simple to figure out. There are some benefits to going back (financial, and the kids get their dad back), but the price is more psychological to me. And, we did marry and I'm still torn by the importance (to me) of the vows, so far I haven't moved on with someone else and neither did H. I'm sort of hoping that he would meet someone and let me go, and I would like to try dating someone else too. I'm just getting tired of the games and I feel like he's making me a puppet on a string. I'm thinking, may be he wanted to "go into the cave" while I'm pregnant and I'm not able to move on, once the baby comes, and I get my body back, he decides he doesn't want our "marriage" to end! Even more issues I can't forgive!
I know I'll need atleast a year to devote all my energy to the baby (I'm a 37 year old in a 100 year old body - lol - kidding, but I have an energy sapping thyroid problem) and DD is also highly energetic.
Any men here been through something like my H and try to get your wife back? How long did you try and what did it take to give up? I really need some prophetic answers here. It doesn't help that I'm going to have another baby soon, I feel like there's a pressure cooker working in my head.