Separation..?
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Separation..?
| Sun, 09-17-2006 - 8:10am |
The cousellor suggested that we try a controlled separation. It would entail a list of guidelines, we would continue conselling together, have a controlled amountof contact, the objective is to see if reconciliation is possible.
I've been looking for somewhere to live. I know that I can't stay here for much longer. If we avoid each other and only concentrate on the day to day stuff, it's not that bad... it's when we fight or I consider how unlikely it is that i will ever have loving feelings for him again that i think it should end. The concept of a trial separation seems like a bit of a cushion to that side of me that is undecided... like I can have the space to get my head straight and not have to file divorce papers until I'm ready.
How many of you have tried a separation like this? What was the outcome?
I can say that what I don't want is to separate for a while, get lonely or scared, and then come back even if it's the wrong thing to do! But, I guess that's up to me.
I've been looking for somewhere to live. I know that I can't stay here for much longer. If we avoid each other and only concentrate on the day to day stuff, it's not that bad... it's when we fight or I consider how unlikely it is that i will ever have loving feelings for him again that i think it should end. The concept of a trial separation seems like a bit of a cushion to that side of me that is undecided... like I can have the space to get my head straight and not have to file divorce papers until I'm ready.
How many of you have tried a separation like this? What was the outcome?
I can say that what I don't want is to separate for a while, get lonely or scared, and then come back even if it's the wrong thing to do! But, I guess that's up to me.

cbote...
Pianoguy has never tried the "trial separation" suggestion. But apparently the concept works one for several others in one of 2 ways:
1. Distance will bring bickering couples back together
OR
2. Hasten the divorce process even faster when one (or both) has his/her eyes on someone else!
You can exist in the same house or apartment as ROOMMATES...but inevitably, one (or both) of you will get on the nerves of the other? This is when it's almost better to "return home to Mom and Dad" or "seek out a close friend who has a spare bedroom that's unoccupied!"
Pianoguy