should I be harder
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| Sun, 03-11-2007 - 9:34pm |
I am still going through my divorce and every day is a challenge. The divorce was my decision and it took me 10 years to go through with it. Here is the thing, I don't hate my ex, I just don't feel anything for him. I know that sounds harsh but empathy is the best that I can do. A year before I filed he moved to Texas for work and I stayed behind to finish school. He called me last week to tell me that he had screwed up his tax papers and as a result he owes the gov't a ton of money. Well, I had given him the option to file seperate or joint and he wanted nothing to do with paying any of "my taxes" so he said seperate. Well, I did my taxes this weekend and because I have the kids, dependant care expense and student loan interest as well I am getting money back.
Don't get me wrong I have plenty of bills that I can spend the money on but a part of me thinks that I should at least have our taxes run together and see if there is anyway that it would come out as an tax neutral situation. It probably wouldn't but I am just so used to taking care of him and fixing his mistakes that I feel guilty. I know that he would not even give it a second thought if the shoe were on the other foot but I am really trying not to be one of those divorced couples that can't be in the same room together and use their kids as go betweens and weapons. Last Christmas I paid for the presents that the kids wanted to get their dad and will do the same for his birthday and Father's day before they leave to spend summer time with him this year.
Can someone please tell me if my hard work to keep this a pleasant divorce will be worth it in the end? Because in all honesty most days I just want to skewer him and BBQ him over hot coals. Am I being niave to believe that this is the best way to be for our kids?

I would just tell him that you already talked about that, made a decision, and that you've already filed--end of discussion.
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~