(((HUGS))) and I'm so sorry you're going through this. Yes, your snooping into his blackberry was wrong, but his behavior with these other women is even more wrong, and now that you've seen what's on the blackberry, can you honestly keep going without confronting him about it? You also said that you have kids and you can't hurt them by leaving their father, but, IMO, you wouldn't be the one hurting him.. he would. After all, he's the one who's behaving inappropriately with other women, not you. I can't tell you whether to stay or go, after all it's never that easy, and only you can decide what's right for you and your children, but IMO, staying in an unhappy marriage where you're so miserable all the time is not good for them any more than it is good for you.
Your husband isn't going to get mad at you for snooping in his Blackberry. He knows you know he cheats. He's going to get mad because you're holding him accountable for his actions. He knows its wrong to cheat on you; he just doesn't care.
I have a couple of recommendations:
1)If you can download his emails or text messages from these other women to a computer where you can print them off and keep hard copies. You might need these later. You might also want to track your husband's internet history - where he goes, how long he's there, and monitor email as well. You can even buy tracking programs to install on your computer. You don't have to tell him you're looking, just do it. Keep records.
I hope that you will think about what I am here to say and won't view it as attacking.
******************************************* “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over againStephanie
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Mn,
Your husband isn't going to get mad at you for snooping in his Blackberry. He knows you know he cheats. He's going to get mad because you're holding him accountable for his actions. He knows its wrong to cheat on you; he just doesn't care.
I have a couple of recommendations:
1)If you can download his emails or text messages from these other women to a computer where you can print them off and keep hard copies. You might need these later. You might also want to track your husband's internet history - where he goes, how long he's there, and monitor email as well. You can even buy tracking programs to install on your computer. You don't have to tell him you're looking, just do it. Keep records.
2)Make an appointment with a marriage counselor.
CL-Wisdomtooth2020