so manipulative!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2005
so manipulative!
3
Sat, 12-17-2005 - 8:49pm

last weekend the stbx took the kids to his parents (a 3 hr drive)..I thought this was kinda weird since he was going to see them on the 24th and he doesnt go there without a reason but he can do whatever he wants with them..

today he called the kids at his regular time from his parents number...he usually calls from his cellphone so when I saw the number come up I thought it was his mom (very unusual at that)..so I answered...the kids usually answer when he calls...he just said.."can I speak to the kids"...before I thought about it I said "why are you calling from your parents?"...he just repeated the same thing...then the lightbulb went on ...he had taken his gf there to meet his parents..that is why he went there last weekend..to tell them about her..

I just laughed...he could have called the kids from his cellphone & I wouldnt have talked to him and would have never known that they were there...but he called from his parents so I would know what was going on!...how manipulative!!

to top it off ...he didnt even really talk to the kids...I had happened to look at the clock when the phone rang..so I know he was on the phone with them for 2 mins tops!
it's like he just called to make sure I knew what he was doing...this is after I "accidently" got a phone call from his urologist about his vastectomy reversal...it could be coincidental...but I doubt it!

he is soo manipulative..but what bugs me is it works!!!!

argghhhhhh!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Sun, 12-18-2005 - 7:14am
Interesting that he goes out of his way to get to you when he's with someone else.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2005
Sun, 12-18-2005 - 8:55am

thank you for saying so most of the time I don't feel like I'm moving on.

what irks me is he has been doing stuff like that for the last 11mos..and I let it get to me!...I let it ruin my Saturday..but not today!...my kids and I are going to finsh up the Christmas prep and have fun! (did that sound convincing?lol)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
Sun, 12-18-2005 - 12:45pm
Good for you that you are not going to let this bother you now. He is playing this game to get a rise out of you. My ex is the same way. When he first moved back to town with his girlfriend, he went out of his way to throw it all in my face. And it irked me as well. He has really toned things down now that he sees that I respond to him as if I don't care (even if it bothers me sometimes, I don't let him know that). He does it to say "ha ha, I have someone else and you don't". Even though part of me knows he's with her because I wouldn't take him back and because he can't make it on his own. He's never been alone. I know that he is insecure and still has angry feelings towards me ever since I won against him in court for custody and child support. But my priority is the kids and I don't let this crap with him get out of hand for them. Your doing a great job on your own. Keep it up. Take care.