Still stuck and miserable

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Still stuck and miserable
2
Mon, 11-12-2007 - 5:35pm

I've posted before. About a year ago this month, I told my H that I was unhappy and wanted a D. It was a very difficult thing for me to say. We've been together for 14 years but married only 3. I know that I made the right decision. What I really want is to move on and start my life. The problem is that neither one of us can afford the mortgage by ourselves so we are forced to stay living together until our house sells. We have no children and we aren't fighting but we're not moving forward either. Like I said this has been going on for a year now. It's sad, uncomfortable and

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 11-13-2007 - 8:39am

Hi there... oh, I"ve been in that boat (living in the house together until it sold), but fortunately, for us, the house sold relatively quickly... and no, you're not going to really be able to "move on" as long as you're living together.... is it possible to reduce the price to see if that helps to move it? (I know there are lots of factors, but it is a way out if you can make the numbers work.)


As for the counseling... we did that, too... for a while... and the only reason that I agreed to go was because I hoped it would help him understand why we didn't need to be married.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Tue, 11-13-2007 - 1:21pm

Thanks for responding. We did in fact lower the price and we got a lot of positive feedback but no action. I'm just feeling really lonely lately. I miss having a man to anything. There are no second thoughts about the divorce. I just really want to get out there and start dating. I miss the closeness of a man. My marriage was NEVER a romantic one. There was no intimacy so I really long to find that. I know that I made the mistake of settling for less than what I truly wanted and for that there are consequences. I'm just so sad and depressed. What also brings me down is fact that I really don't have any single friends to go out with. Also, this marriage has caused me a lot financial problems that will be with me forever. I'm angry about that. I know I sound pathetic, like some woman who feels sorry for herself and maybe I do a little. That is why this website is so helpful to me. I don't want to burden my friends with my misery because I don't want to be a constant downer and I don't want them to worry about me. Not that I hold out completely but when the conversation becomes