support groups
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| Wed, 01-24-2007 - 2:42pm |
Has anyone had the experience of a divorce support group:|?
I found a local group here through
www.divorcecare.com
The group meets every Wed night (starting tonight) for the next 13 wks.
From what I understand they pretty much go through the stages of greiving and validate your feelings and basically explain why you are feeling the way you are.
My divorce was final last Sept. but I just seem to be at a point that I am stuck.
The healing process is crazy, just when I think I have made progress, I feel like the rug has been pulled again...I feel like I am loosing my mind sometimes.
My X told me yesterday that he is going to take DD out this weekend and meet up with OW (the one he had the affair with), this just kills me, all I can invision is the two of them walking around holding hands like teenagers and my daughter being there...Won't they be a cute little happy family.
Why do I feel so abandoned and left out? Will I ever feel better? I hate rehashing all of this all the time, I just want to be ok again.

Jus,
Divorcecare is an excellent support program. I encourage you to attend the weekly sessions. You'll find others who've experienced or are experiencing the same type of issues you are dealing with. Sometimes that helps you feel less alone or strange. (I know that helped me when I divorced.)
And, it will help you understand what you're going through is "normal" when it comes to loss. We live in a culture that doesn't like to acknowledge loss (death, divorce, job loss, etc.) so it's important to have your feelings be validated. You'll also find it helpful just to know its a process. Grief takes time to process and everyone's experience is different.
I also recommend you check out a book I've used and recommended dozens of times over the years. It's called "Rebuilding: When your relationship ends," by Bruce Fisher. It's like a roadmap for breaking up. The best thing I like about this book is that it gives you some hope for happier future.
Hang in there and let yourself feel what you feel. Find constructive ways to deal with your pain, i.e. the support group, friends, therapy, a hobby, etc. You'll find it gets easier with time but you have to go through these stages first.
Good luck and keep us posted.
CL-Wisdomtooth2020
I would pursue divorcecare. I have emailed two churches who have it, but neither has emailed me back. I think something that gives you room to vent, but also has structure and tries to help you progress is a good bet.
GL
M
One of the gals recommended signing up for the emails they send everyday as encouragement, she said they are wonderful!
thanks for everyones support!
Cheers,
Ruthann