Surrender to win?
Find a Conversation
| Tue, 02-12-2008 - 9:05pm |
I badly need some advice! I've been divorced for nearly a year. It was, and continues to be, an extremely hostile situation (due, I believe, to some unaddressed mental health issues on my ex's part). We have two children, a 21-year-old daughter from whom he is estranged, and a nine-year-old son. I have our son for the majority of the time and his father pays court-ordered child support, which is garnished from his wages.
One of the problems lies with expenses for our son which, by court order, his father is obliged to assist me in paying. He simply refuses. I have brought him back to court two or three times now on this matter, and I have yet to receive payment from him. I cannot afford a lawyer (I still owe $15,000 of the total $50,000 the divorce cost) so I have been representing myself. I file a motion, we get a court date, the judge orders him to pay and he just doesn't.

Oh my goodness- that sounds exhausting!
Hi Debbi,
Thanks so much for the supportive response. I just feel so overwhelmed by all of this sometimes!
I'm sure he has cut off communication as a power play. He is a HUGE control freak and he just can't stand that he is no longer in control of me or, for the most part, of our son. We've done the parenting classes. It's mandatory here before your divorce can become final and, obviously, the importance of communication just did not sink in with him. I'm almost thinking that I will do what my son wants when it comes to schedule changes, then let the ex take me to court and then we can discuss his unwillingness to communicate.
Part of my frustration is with the court system - the judge is unwilling to discuss anything that is not specifically listed on the motion, so I have to file another motion to talk about things like communication. I could spend my entire life in court!!!
Thanks for your advice.
Bonnie