Told him no calls unless concerning baby
Find a Conversation
| Tue, 06-14-2005 - 9:38am |
I left my ex a message this morning not to call me unless it concerned the baby. Throughout the day yesterday he called back and forth asking for help with his resume. I told him I sent him an email to please read it. He kept saying he would as soon as he finished his resume. Mid afternoon I tried calling him to ask if he could take the baby on Friday and if he read the email yet. I got no answer after a few tries. He finally called me back and I told him I tried calling him and asked him what happened, didnt he get the calls. He was like oh, I must have turned off my phone by mistake.
Fine, then this morning he sent me an email responding to one I had sent him and he says he's sorry he couldnt read it yesterday, he had company before he finished his resume. But yet yesterday he told me a different excuse. I feel like such a fool. On sunday when he dropped the baby off when leaving he ran his hand down my arm saying how he needs to think about things, he's so stressed, then yesterday all the calling for help with his resume and then as soon as he doenst "need" me anymore he turns off his phone b/c he has "company". But he doesnt dare turn off his phone when he comes to see the baby at my house. Suppose there had been an emergency regarding the baby, and I was trying to call him, is this how it will be, when he's with her he will turn off his phone and to hell with anyone else. Why do I keep letting this man in my life. What the heck is my problem. He just cares about this damn girl and she got mad and left him stranded b/c she couldnt wait in my lobby. She's so immature and this is who he caters to, I dont get.

Pages
You're probably right. If i dont stand firm on this now, this confusion will keep going on. I dont want to be second or third choice.
It pi$$es me off b/c I have always made him my 1st and only. You know what really burns me is I've always fought for us, gave him second and third chances after he cheated more than once. When I found out he had been with the "ow" that he has twins with now the 2nd time, I kicked him out. He threatened to take everything and leave me with nothing so I had the locks changed the next morning, got a restraining order and took him to court for child support, I was so afraid and enraged. I admit I didnt stop to calm down, or think about what I was doing. I was so distraught. He stayed out for 2 days and 2 nights before even trying to "come home", not even 1 phone call and I had just found out he had cheated on me again with the same woman. In retrospect, I guess I shouldnt have got the restraining order and apologized for that. And dont you know that ba$tard has said in the beginning of all the arguments that what I did, the damage I created cant be repaired, but I tried to repair "us" after he cheated. I feel so stupid for giving him all the chances I gave him. How dare he. How can what I did be worse than what he did! After all I gave him. URRRRGGG! Now he lost his job, his truck, has twins, and a "new" gf 21yrs old, his life has fallen apart since we broke up and he doesnt even see it. He doesnt know what a good woman he had in me. Will he ever. His PRIDE is gonna choke him. He had also said in the past How would it look him "coming back" after what I did to him. How can he be so blind and selfish. It's like he's the only one who can make mistakes and be given second chances
Thanks for letting me VENT
Sometimes I wonder if that's what he's doing with this girl, trying to "get over me" but he obviously is over me b/c this is his 2nd relationship and Ive told him more than once that I wanted to make things work, be a family again that I still loved him and he's said he cant think about that, he's with someone else and he's happy despite the fact that he's done things with me that suggest he's not as happy as he claims to be and he's not a "changed man" as he claims to be.
Im just tired of these emotional games he plays. I guess he is really still confused and doensnt really know what he wants. A few weeks ago he said she will be in his life for a long time then a few days ago after getting on him about why "she" matters so much to him and I didnt he said maybe soon she wont matter anymore just leave it alone. So who knows with him. I just cant keep this going.
Your post made me think of my parents. My mom is a wonderful woman, but my dad could never have made her happy. He didn't have what it takes. He cheated on her, he used drugs, he made her life horrible. It didn't matter how good of a wife and mother she was, nothing she did could change him. He couldn't see what a wondeful wife he had in her, because he was blind to that and for whatever reason, he had to focus on himself and his needs only. He was a good person in some ways, but he could have married the perfect woman, and he still could not have made the marriage work. He didn't have it in him.
I think it is so incredibly unlikely your ex will live happily ever after with the 21 year old. Look at his history of making relationships work. Then the fact she's 21 and can't even handle waiting a few blocks away while he picks up his son, and the fact that he's got two other children with another woman, plenty of to be jealous of between the two of you and all the children. If you tell me in 5 years or even 2 years that they are still together and things are going great for them, I will fall off my chair. None of this is about you or any shortcoming you have. This is all about your ex and his unending needs and desire to blame everyone else for his problems.
Pages