Trying not to explode

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2005
Trying not to explode
5
Tue, 01-17-2006 - 11:26pm

I've gone from content and even happy to really upset and angry. My STBX stays at my house during the day to watch our 5 year old. Tonight on the table I found what he's been putting his artistic energy into when I found a story he wrote and is illustrating in the fashion of a kid's book. There is no title yet, but the story is about a sweet caring young man who is being held captive in a castle by a horrible two headed beast named Gwenzilla. Now, this may seem funny, but I am furious and hurt even more than I already was.

For one, he is not f'ing innocent. He has been a selfish jerk who put his dreams above his family's needs. Two, I gave him and that whore money to buy food with because they had nothing to eat! Three, he has the nerve to be in MY HOUSE spending his time making stupid crap about how horrible I am instead of doing something to help support his kids, WHILE I WORK!

I HATE HIM! I want to scream and swear and punch him and have a mad raging fit.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2006
Wed, 01-18-2006 - 11:17am
Gwen, you have every right to be furious. I would be, too. That is horribly immature on his part. What a jerk! Why is it men have to be so immature and petty? Hugs!
Avatar for momtojoeybear
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 01-18-2006 - 12:08pm

Gwen,

That is horrible... and you have every right to be angry... I certainly would be...

Sending lots of hugs your way...

Julie

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2004
Wed, 01-18-2006 - 12:15pm

You have every right to be raging mad!!!!! Did you destroy his masterpiece? I wonder if I would have had the guts to do that...

Oh scream and yell away!!!! Do something physical, run, bike, etc. My friend gave me one of those kiddie punching bags with the sand in the bottom that you blow up with air--know what I'm talking about? You hit it and it pops back up. I found it helped me to release a bit of the fury. Poor ole plastic thing, I'd send it to you, but I beat it up--he won't hold air anymore. Maybe I'll get me a new one. I highly recommend it -- perhaps with a photo of the ex's smiling face attached.

cupcake

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 01-18-2006 - 1:00pm
It sounds like splitting up with him is going to be a move in the right direction..... how immature of him!

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2005
Wed, 01-18-2006 - 10:31pm

Today has been much better. Last night I called him and blew up at him for what he did. Turns out his girlfriend wrote the story to amuse him, and then he did the drawings for it. She had thought he'd thrown it away a few weeks ago, and was horrified that I'd seen it. I've never spoken more than two words to her and have only seen her a few times, but she got on the phone and apologized to me. The bizarre thing that happened was that in the middle of our very calm talk she suddenly went silent and then said she needed to go to a hospital. I said okay, and then she hung up.

STBX called me back after about 30 seconds and asked me what I had said to her. I said nothing, that it was totally civil. Turns out she suffers from anxiety and got so upset over what happened that she had a full on anxiety attack and turned white, started passing out, and was vomiting profusely.

As odd as it is, I feel sort of protective of her. This girl is 23, living with an unemployed 35 year old man who is not yet divorced and has two kids. This morning when STBX showed up, I went off at him, but in a calm way. I told him he needs to grow up and stop making her responsible for him. That if she is that fragile he needs to back off. I told him he is hard to live with. That he is on the phone all day, sloppy, and has little consideration for others. I reminded him that for a good portion of our first year together I would wake up in the middle of the night throwing up out of anxiety. I reduced him to the point of almost tears, but I think he really needed a kick in the butt.

I've tried wake up calls with him before, but maybe he'll listen this time.

I guess we'll see.