uggggh.. he has no brain...
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| Mon, 05-29-2006 - 10:29pm |
stbx told me and the kids that he was moving out this Tuesday. After blowing the kids off this w/e. He was supposed to be here for them by 9am (the beginning of his parenting time) on Sunday. I told him several times (including in writing) that I was going out-of-town on Sunday and leaving at 10:30am. I also said that I would be happy to include the kids in my plans if he did not have anything planned. Well he tells me that he ahd planned to take them to see his folks on Monday for Memorial Day. The kids havent seen his parents since xmas, as they live in Az in the winter and here in Michigan in teh summer. But, that he was going 'out' on Sunday night and assumed I would be here to watch them. Well after wabbling for several days he finally said he wanted them.
Well, Sunday morning rolled around and no stbx. He tends to go to his gf house to spend nights. I called him at 11am and 11:30am. Finally I cancelled my plans. I had made plans thinking I had no kids. There wasnt going to be enough room in the cottage at my friends for all of us. But, I switched it back to my other option of going to my parents lakehouse and took the kids with me. He of course was mad and even wanted my to return them by Monday morn so he could take them to his parents. I said no I was not cutting my w/e short and that I had already cancelled some plans due to his no show.
Anyway, me and kids get home tomight and he decides now at 9:00pm at night is a good time to start moving his stuff out. In fact, he has the kids helping him!! They look sad and scared. His atty and mine both told him to move out when the children were not home. But, no he does is right in front of them. Then, as I am putting them to bed he annouces that they are taking the day off school tomorrow to help him move!!! I said absolutely not!! This is their last week of school. Only 4 more day left and reminded him of what the atttys said. He backed down. I told the kids that they could go see daddys new apartment when they get home from school. They looked releived.
OMG I do not undertand his thinking.
Jan

From the Wizard of Oz:
I could while away the hours,
conferrin' with the flowers,
consultin' with the rain,
And my head I'd be scratchin'
While my thoughts were busy hatchin'
IF I ONLY HAD A BRAIN!
Some men never REALLY get it, it's got to be due to the empty space that sits about three feet above their A##!!
Keep holding your line!!!
he not only lacks a brain but where is his heart??
you know - the 'moving out/separation' period is difficult no matter what. but remember - its a period, and it will pass. it will be difficult for your kids to get thru this, but they will. and the bottom line is: nobody knows what the 'best' way is, maybe your kids helping him move out is NOT the worst thing in the world, you will only know this after the fact. give your kiddies extra hugs, and you continue to be the best parent in the world
hugsssssssssssssss.
Sounds just like my ex. Hang in there. My ex used the kids through the whole divorce process. It was awful. I just continued to hug them and tell them none of it was their fault and that no matter what I love them with all my heart. They are getting through it but he still tells them things that upsets them almost every week. He told them he wouldn't have to move into a shack if I wouldn't have divorced him and that it is my fault that he has to live in a one room apartment and he can't afford to feed them more than mac and cheese. (which is bs because I've seen him and his girlfriend at Outback and Red Lobster on more than one occasion) It's never his fault for not going out and getting a decent job. It's my fault because I refused to support him while he sat home on the internet surfing for porn and talking to other women.
Every chance he gets he will confront me in front of them to make me look bad. He will tell them that I'm trying to take them away from him even though we have joint custody and the exact same amount of time.
Don't let him get to you. Keep loving your kids. They will see through him eventually. One of my kids told me the other day that they knew their daddy lied a lot and he was probably going to hell so they were praying for him. That made me realize that they see more than I give them credit for.