UPDATE on ex back in town.
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UPDATE on ex back in town.
| Tue, 11-15-2005 - 10:59pm |
Thanks to everyone who posted on my last thread. Here's an update for everyone. My ex is moved back; sharing an apartment with the gf. After the last incident of him showing up at my house and coming inside, I called him and told him that wasn't going to happen anymore. Since then, things have been civil to say the least. He dropped the kids off Sunday night without incident. So far this week, he has picked the kids up from school and spent 2 evenings with them. He took dd to ballet. And when I picked them up, he was waiting with them in the entry way and when I pulled up he sent them outside and didn't chase after them. (Rewind, for just a sec. The first time I picked them up at his apartment he sent them out and followed them so he could talk to me; I was civil (basically I ignored him, since I knew there would be another fight coming, and we drove off). I think he is finally getting the "hint" that I don't want to talk to him, don't want to see him, and basically don't want to look at him. This has been easier to deal with now. We have holiday visitation worked out through New Year's, and he has been reasonable with visitation and weekends so FAR! Things are going decent right now, that could change though, regarding child support, he is behind $3000 and hasn't made an effort to find a job yet. My case worker has his new phone number and address and is forwarding my case to the state's attorney, since he is in contempt. I am going to try very hard not to feel responsible for that; I know in my heart that he did this to himself, but I know he will come back and blame me for this and things will get crappy again for awhile. Right now, I am just enjoying the "quiet". That's my update; will let you all know more as things develop. Thanks again!

I should KNOW that when I post on these boards about something, that I am jinxing it! Today when I picked up the kids from school, my ex was there walking out with my daughter. He walked up to me with her and I asked what was going on, He KNEW I was picking up the kids because we had JUST talked about it last night! He said "oh nothing, I just wanted to make sure that you were picking them up and that I didn't have to"! Oh GIVE me a BREAK!! He started talking to me about the visitation schedule even though we had JUST talked about it last night. And I clarified things for him again, and turned and started to walk away, and he SHOUTED "HEY, we NEED to talk about this!!" I couldn't BELIEVE it and I was SOOOOOO embarrased! The kids and I left and he started walking to his car to leave! I am not going to be able to continue handling situations like these.
He has been very difficult off and on since he has returned. He hasn't even been moved back a WEEK, and I am already tired of this!! Like I said, I spoke too soon! I am debating calling him to let him know that I will NOT discuss visitation with him in public or in front of the kids, but I doubt it will do much good and we will just fight. I don't know ultimately what this man wants, but he made his bed and now he has to lie in it without me! I don't know what bothers him more, the fact that we are over or the fact that I don't care and won't enable him anymore. He has a gf to fall back on and I don't need him in my face all the time about stupid things. He is obviuously struggling with something internally, but that isn't my problem, nor should I have to bear the brunt of his hostility since he is the one who chose to leave the family. Thanks for your post!!