Using maiden name if you have children?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2004
Using maiden name if you have children?
5
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 4:35pm

I just read the post regarding changing back to maiden names without children, but what if you do have children? I asked for my maiden name back when I divorced (it was final last friday-happy day:0) but I'm wondering if it's a mistake because of the children. Do divorced women ever hyphenate their married and maiden names? Any opinions or experience?

Thanks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 5:04pm

I think that each situation is different... and in today's society, there are many children who's parent has a different last name... so it's not awkward or difficult for the children in any way.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 5:27pm
I'm struggling with the same thing. I have two kids with my STBX, and I have NO clue if I want to switch my name back or not. My oldest sister has been married 3 times. Twice to the same guy! When she divorced him she changed her last name back and when she remarried him she decided to keep her maiden name. And it's so funny because she has 2 children from her first marriage that have one last name, a daughter with her H with his last name, and she uses her maiden name! So confusing! But I guess it can work out just fine. :)
It's just my maiden name is long, confusing, and always mispronounced/spelled, lol. But I'm leaning towards changing it just because I feel I need to reclaim my individuality from him. He no longer has a claim in me! :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 8:28pm

I absolutely want my maiden name back. Been my name for 37 out of my 47 years. Will I do it? Probably. But, have to wait for the divorce to be final (one year) and will see how my kids are with it (they are 6 and 5 so I am going to tread lightly).

GL with your decision.

M

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2007
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 10:46pm
I didn't change my name when I got married. The only problem I've ever had with it is that my husband is Chinese and when my kids were babies, people seemed to assume I had adopted them from China since they had a Chinese last name (which doesn't make sense, because if you adopted a baby they would have your last name). So, I agree that in today's world it is very common for families to have different last names and it shouldn't be a problem. I think going with the maiden name is a good idea (obviously, since I never even changed mine ;) )
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2007
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 10:49pm
I didn't change my name in the first place. There has never been an issue. If you want your maiden name back - do what is best for you. There are lots of women out there with different last names from their children. Some people will still call you Mrs. Fill in Your Kids Last Name Here - I get that and it was NEVER my name. But I think if it helps you feel like you are reclaiming something or you want it for any of a whole other list of reasons do it.