Very difficult situation

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2006
Very difficult situation
5
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 9:14pm
Hi, I'm new to this message board. I have a very difficult situation. To make the long story short, one month before I gave birth my husband started having a manic episode (He is bipolar). I didn't know this side of him but his family told me that he has been thru that twice before. The manic episode made my husband behavior very unpredictable so when I was in the hspital I had to report the situation to a social worker and I even had to go to the court and request a restraining order wish was approved for one year, after that he violated the restraining order and was put on yale for 1 1/2 weeks. Now three months after I gave birth to our beautiful daughter he moved to a very far state is asking for the divorce and claims that our daughter is not his. He is asking for a paternity test. I don't mind doing it since I am 100% sure that is his daughter. I was never unfaithful to him, NEVER.The thing is that he doesn't want to pay the child support stated by the court. I don't know how the law works but is very frustrating since I have not receive a penny for our daughter and there will be a hearing this monday in wish the judge is going to talk about the child support and criminal charges since my husband violated the restraining order. That I know he is not going to show up at the hearing for what his father told me. I will like to hear some advice from you if you have been thru this or have hear of a similar case (wish I bet is not that common).
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 11:07pm

My x is bipolar with frequent episodes of mania. I don't really have any suggestions for you other than you need to understand that he is going to exhibit impulsive behavior, often be irrational, and can be paranoid and aggressive, will have difficulty taking responsibility for any of his actions. As much as I hate to say it, it is probably good that he moved far away. If he is in a "bad place" mentally - he will probably continue to deny paternity even in light of a paternity test. Reality will be based on his beliefs, which may not necessarily concur with the real world. Good luck to you.

Tina

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 09-26-2006 - 12:36am
HI there!

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2006
Tue, 09-26-2006 - 2:51pm
Hi, Thank you so much for your interest in my case. Things are getting a little complicated. My husband was supposed to show up yesterday at the hearing and he didn't. He was supposed to show up because of criminal charges when he violated the restraining order and went to yale.Because of that the judge ordered a warrant for his arrest. This doesn't mean that they are going to look for him and arrest him but if for some reason he is stopped by police and they have to look for his records he will be arrested in Arizona (were he is right now) and be brough to new hampshire (where all the court thing is taking place since we were both from there. Also the judge is giving him 10 days to pay the amount he owes in child support.There's going to be another hearing on october 17 for child support I think that if he has'nt pay they will look for him and arrest him. The divorce papers he sent me from Arizona don't count since Arizona don't have jurisdiction on that matter neither on the patternity issues. For he patternity test he has to come to new england to do all tests in the same lab. As you can see things are a LITTLE complicated. (Sorry for my english wich is not so good)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 09-26-2006 - 4:22pm
But if he has to come to New England for the paternity test... that he wants :-)

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2006
Tue, 09-26-2006 - 8:50pm
Yes, That's exactly what my lawyer told me. The thing is that I don't know what to expect from my husband. I think he is doing whatever he please with the justice.