What to Do??

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2006
What to Do??
1
Tue, 07-04-2006 - 7:37pm

My Ex. is making me crazy. I cant stand what he is doing to our children. He doesnt take them for visits like he is suppose,makes promises and breaks them. This morning he talked to my oldest and told him that he would pick them up around 5 and they would BBQ and shoot off fireworks. So we rearranged our plans and shot of fireworks this morning and what not. 10 to 5 he calls and say "so are you guys on your way over for BBQ?" I said "What do you mean?" "You told Max that you were picking them up" he says "no i didnt, thought you would all come" I said "Im not coming over for a BBQ with you" he says "Bring the kids over" I say "pick them up, that is how it is arranged you pick them up here and then I pick them up from your house when your done" He says "if you cant come the kids dont need to" Argue a little more and he says "im done playing games with you, you always play games when it comes to the kids" then he hangs up. Now I have 3 kids that were expecting to go to Dads and celebrate the 4th with him, that are upset now becouse they are not going. He calls them after I pick the 14 year old up from work to let him and the other two know that its not his fault. That all mom had to do was come over and have BBQ with us. I stayed up all not preparing food for this, I even turned down an invitation to go to the lake for a 4th bash just so i could spend it with you guys.

Tells them that he even called me this weekend becouse he was going to buy him (the oldest) a car becouse he seen a really good deal, all Mom had to do was dig into bill money and buy it, I would have given it back to her on Monday when the bank opened. But she chose not to so you can blame her for you not having a car too.

He makes me soooo mad!! He lies about how things are to the kids. He didnt even tell me to take bill money for a car. He told me about the car and that was it. Good thing he didnt ask becouse I wouldnt have done it anyway. Like I would ever see a dime of it on Monday or any day for that matter.

Now the phone calls start for the night. Already 3 in 15 minutes. The last message was "if you wont talk to me then i want that 20 back by tomorrow morning or there is going to be hell to pay" You see two weeks ago (the last time he had the kids) he gave me 20 bucks for gas to bring the kids over to him and pick them up. Last week when he was mad at me for some other reason he changed it to the money was a loan. I actually didnt want to argue with him so I tried to give it back to him the next day and he says "dont worry about it" Now he is going to use that 20 bucks for everything. He has money--ft job plus side jobs that he does all the time, plus his mom sends him money all the time. I on the other hand live paycheck to paycheck--child support is strictly for rent (that way i dont have to worry about it) Im going to put 20 bucks in the stupid mail tomorrow so he will shut up and stop using it on me.

What am I going to do? How can things keep going on like this? My youngest is only 3, is this what i get to look forward to for the next 15 years?? Is there anything I can do? What it boils down to is he had the day off today, started drinking around 1 and decided he better not get behind the wheel. Well he knew he had to pick them up so why start drinking? The reason I pick them up after a visit is so I dont have to worry about them riding with someone that is drunk.

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! Thanks for the Vent!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: ourhouse006
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 11:09pm

You said: "This morning he talked to my oldest and told him that he would pick them up around 5 and they would BBQ and shoot off fireworks."


Keep reminding your kids of what their dad says... and what he does.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~