What does this mean will happen?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
What does this mean will happen?
5
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 3:13pm
A friend of mine filed for divorce thru an attorney on July 8. Soon to be ex is scheduled to be served this week. Friend of mine receives letter in the mail yesterday from soon to be ex's attorney claiming that they filed June 29. Friend was never served. Technically who filed first? Is it by date filed or date served? Is there a time limit on being served from the date filed?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 3:28pm

If

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Thu, 07-14-2005 - 9:54am

They have 120 days from the date of filing to serve her. On the 121st day, the case is closed. If he filed on June 28th, he still has ample time to serve her.

And by the way, what difference does it make who filed first? I don't understand why that would matter.

Lacie

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Thu, 07-14-2005 - 11:02am
I guess it doesn't matter who filed first. I think it is interesting that they filed just days apart, and neither was served yet. Anyway, I told my friend at least you both know you both want a divorce. Thanks for your help.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2004
Fri, 07-15-2005 - 3:20pm

The courts actually stamp the documents as received and filed when they get them. Regardless of when someone is actually given the papers, whoever filed the documents with the court first, is considered to have filed first and will be the petitioner. The other person will be the respondant.

It can sometimes take a while for the other party to receive the papers. And people don't always have to be "served." In fact, my attorney told me that only very rarely are people actually served anymore. She said that really the only time it's necessary to "serve" someone is when it is dangerous to tell them any other way or if you think the person will try to pretend that they never received notice that they were being divorced. In my case my ex and I had already discussed the divorced and that I had filed so my attorney simply sent him and his attorney a copy of the paperwork when she got it back from the court. Very often having someone served publicly ends up embarrassing them and making them mad - not such a good thing when you are about to have to negotiate about so many things.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2004
Fri, 07-15-2005 - 3:27pm
In my county it does matter who files first. The person who files gets to decide which judge will preside over the divorce if it goes to court. Some judges are more favorable to mothers or fathers when divorces go to court so if there is a chance the divorce will go to court for any reason, it's best to file first. Also I have heard from several attornies that it is also good to be the one to file because most judges assume that when someone files it is because their SPOUSE was the one who had made it impossible for them to continue in the marriage. Very few people file for divorce because they think THEY are the cause of the problems and think their spouse is an angel. I have also heard that years ago, it was better for the woman NOT to file because the courts would view her as being "left" and vulnerable. However, now that women are more educated, more likely to have jobs, and can make as much money as men courts have abandoned this view.