What's your story?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
What's your story?
21
Sun, 08-20-2006 - 8:51am

Just a few random questions this morning!


1. Are your parents divorced?


2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed?


3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?


4. Are you happy right now at this moment?


5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be?


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2006
Sun, 08-20-2006 - 11:23pm

1. Are your parents divorced?

Yes, since i was 8 years old; one year before father died (in 2002), he confessed that divorcing my mother was the worst mistake of his life, and that he was still very much in love with her ... this after remarrying, but never really "divorcing" my stepmother, they were separated for nearly 25 years due to "religious" reasons of not divorcing but both went on with waaay separate lives ... hope my STBX has similiar confession cause man he's reallly gonna miss out on the definition of a true good woman, although he's convinced that skank GF is the best thing that ever happened to him, emphasis on "thing."

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed?

mid-July, still waiting for STBX to be served---argh, frustrating!

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?

yes; sister went through a divorce from the worst loser ever, about 10 years ago ... brother is a solid, committed, and loving same-sex relationship of 10 years (now there's some irony for 'ya; i love it that they are sticking it to society's definition of "family values" ... some "values" when 50 percent-plus of marriages in this country end in divorce!!

4. Are you happy right now at this moment?

"in the meantime," i'm miserable, but any day now, i know that i will be back on track and on the road to finding true peace and happiness ...

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be?

i would have married my soul mate when he asked me to in college, but was too stupid and young to accept his proposal. now, he's happily married, successful with a child and i'm constantly "coveting" his life, feeling very guilty for that; we still share an intense connection that's undeniable, but can't act on nothing ... darn. i definitely would not and should never have married my STBX, totally was NOT compatible with him and truly believed he didn't love or respect me in the first place. only got married because his dying father wanted to see us married. now, FIL has gone on to glory, while i'm stuck here in hell!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2006
Sun, 08-20-2006 - 11:44pm

1. Are your parents divorced?

My parents are both deceased but were married 48 years.

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed?

Just at the beginning stages...haven't filed as yet.

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?

Brother, divorced. Sister divorced and on third marriage.

4. Are you happy right now at this moment?

All of this is relatively new to me at this point so have very mixed emotions about everything although I know in my heart divorce is the right path for me (I initiated it).

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be?

To have spent more time discovering who I was and what I wanted to do with my life before becoming enmeshed in the life of someone else.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 1:13am

1. Are your parents divorced?

Which one and how many times would be more appropriate for me. LOL
Dad- Had three marriages. All ended in divorce. He and my mom had four girls. He and W#2 had two girls and a boy. I'm 44yo and just getting to know one of those half sisters.
Mom- Has been married six times. Is currently married to #6. She and Dad had us four girls. She and H#2 had two girls and a boy.

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed?
I was divorced July 27, 1999.

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?
ODSis- Married twice. Divorced twice. Now with a female partner. 2 dds with 2nd dh.
(This is where I fall in the line up.)
nextDSis- Married twice. Divorced once. 1ds with 1st dh
next DSis- LTR once. Married and divorced once. 1ds, 1dd with LTR. 1dd with xdh
next DSis- LTR once. Now out of that.
This may seem confusing. 1ds with STR guy. 1dd with LTR. 1 dd with LTR that was given up for adoption. 1 ds with LTR.
next DSis- LTR once. Now out of that. 2dd with LTR
DBro- LTR once. Now out of that. 1 dd with LTR

4. Are you happy right now at this moment?
WOrking on rebuilding after dh's EA.

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be?
My codependancies if it was for me. My children's screwed up lives if it was for someone else.

Steph

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 3:24am

1. Are your parents divorced?
No, married 32 years, but mom told me she almost divorced him 15 years ago.

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed?
Soon to be filed. I instigated and have been holding on for what? I think hoping he might actually ask me to come back, but I know I won't go back, so why wait any longer?

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?
1 sister - she was seperated for about a year 18 years ago, but they reconciled, married 19 years now.

4. Are you happy right now at this moment?
Some days, mostly a little scared of this new path I'm on. From stay at home mom to working mom is a scary thing. Not to mention, I've NEVER lived on my own. Went straight from mom and dad's to being married (I was 19).

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be?
Sometimes I think it would be to not have gotten married at 19, but then, I wouldn't have the 3 joys of my life, so I wish I had taken better care of myself over the last couple of years. I became very self destructive in an attempt to get DH's attention. (no it didn't work)

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2005
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 10:00am

1. Are your parents divorced?

nope... they've been married 37 years... it was a second marriage for them both... their exes each cheated on them...

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed?
Filed in March 2005, final in June 2005

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?
My sister has been married nearly 26 years (she's 10 years older then me)... they've had some rocky times and almost divorced several years ago... counseling and effort saved their marriage... both my brothers have also been divorced once.... neither have ever remarried...

here's the "fun" part... my XH's family was my own for nearly 16 years... here's the rundown:

his parents were married 34 years, she walked out, they were divorced in 1994... they are now back together after nearly 10 years apart but have not remarried (as far as i know)

his oldest brother has been married twice and has been single for a long time...

the middle brother was married once, divorced (after they cheated on each other) and is now remarried.

there's a history and a pattern with XH's family... they've all cheated on their former spouses.. and my XH was no acception to that rule...

4. Are you happy right now at this moment?
I'm doing pretty well... i've got a great BF, we are moving in together by the end of this month... and things are just generally looking up right now...

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be?

that i would not have wrapped my life around my XH... we had no kids, and i built a good career for myself... but i relied on him to much socially... and i do wish we would have communicated more... and not gotten together when we were 17 (married at 24)... that never seems to work... i don't regret the relationship we had because it was very good for a long time... i've chosen to learn from my mistakes and not to have regret for things i could or could not change...

Ali

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 11:51am

1. Are your parents divorced?

Yes, they divorced when I was 12.

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed?

We are legally seperated and the final paperwork is being signed and will be filed at one year post seperation, necessary in our state, in the beginning of October.

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?

Yes, I have a brother and sister. No, none have gone thru divorces.

4. Are you happy right now at this moment?

YES! I am so much happier than I have been in YEARS possibly EVER IN MY LIFE!!!!!

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be?
I need help with the physical aspect of caring for my children 24/7 with no backup, nor family backup! Man, sleep is such a luxury, I would make it possible for me to sleep 7 to 8 hours a night!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 2:28pm

1. Are your parents divorced? No, they are going strong with almost 40 years behind them

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed? he filed in May, I was served Aug 11, signing settlement agreement today, divorce final 02-11-07 (days before V-day).

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces? Yes, No

4. Are you happy right now at this moment? Sort of - I'm anxious about signing papers -both good and bad!

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be? I wish I would have invested in the stock market during the big boom - dot com era! I could have been a multi-millionaire! Just dreaming!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 9:47pm

1. Are your parents divorced? Nope!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 9:53pm

"and DS said to me - you wouldn't be the person you are today if you hadn't gone thru what you went thru in that marriage. so ----- I woulnd't undo anything"


I still think your DS is very intiutive and smart!

Karen ~ wildlucky4me

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 10:47pm

1. Are your parents divorced? No they weren't. My father just recently passed away.

2. When were your divorce papers filed, or when will they be filed? Papers filed in Nov '04, was final in April '05.

3. Do you have any siblings? Have any gone through divorces?I have two sisters and a brother all divorced. My younger sister is remarried.

4. Are you happy right now at this moment? Yes. It all SEEMS to be falling into place.

5. If you could change one thing in your life, big or small, what would it be? I would want to be more financially stable.