When you ask for advice here, what ki...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
When you ask for advice here, what ki...
9
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 1:53pm
When you ask for advice here, what kind of response are you looking for the most



  • Tell-it-like-it-is advice (hold the sugar coating please)
  • A pat on the head and a comforting hug
  • Someone to tell

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 2:19pm
Im looking for tell it like it is and some compassoion. I surely dont expect to come here and feel that Im being attacked. I felt that way from step2littleis' message. She could have just been trying to look at things from a different perspective but she came off a little strong.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 8:09pm
I think honesty is best, with a sprinkling of compassion and support. Kind of the the way our CL gives advice ;)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 8:16pm

awwwwww.... 'dats so sweet!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 8:19pm

I selected "other" because I come here I guess to get feedback on what other people have experienced in my similar situation. When I found out the truth only 15 short days ago, I honestly felt like there was no one who has been through such a horrible experience as myself. Now I realize that unfortuneatly this happens all the time and I can get through it. Cyber-friends help!

I have learned that if you don't want truthful advice that you may not want to hear, then don't ask for it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
Wed, 03-01-2006 - 10:49pm

I voted other because sometimes I just want it all.
Seriously I need the whole ball of wax. I like all points of view.You'll know if I only want to vent and get compassion responses.

K:)

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Thu, 03-02-2006 - 11:18am
I do agree that honesty is best. However, honest should not equal mean or hurtful. I think there are plenty of ways to get one's point accross without being unkind or insensitive. I just try to remember that we're all going through a challenging time here.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 6:30am

i think it depends where i am in life....


when i first came here - i was quite hysterical, and i needed a combination of hand holding and firm direction.


now - i need less advice but whatever i need i would prefer it to be straight shooting - hold the sugar coating.


but i do notice that there are different types of peoiple here in different stages and different need levels. some people dislike the straight shooting and need the sugar coating. they are too caught up in their anger and they can't see the 'truth' - they don't WANT to see it yet.


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2005
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 7:02am
Honest opinions are most welcome, but please just don't be hurtful or judgmental about it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2004
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 4:13pm

I mainly want to know if somebody has been in a similar situation, what worked for them, what didn't work. It might help prevent mistakes...

It's also wonderful to have my feelings validated by women who have btdt and know I'm not nuts!