Where do I start?????
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Where do I start?????
| Wed, 03-02-2005 - 10:26am |
I am new to this board. My H and I have been married for 7 months. He has decided that we should no longer be together and file for a legal seperation (we live in NC so we have to be seperated for 1 year before divorce). I am completely shattered. I have never loved someone so much and so hard. I don't know where to begin to start picking myself up and starting over. We have been together for 7 years. I never thought that only 7 months after marriage, we would be here. We only have one car. We live in a 1 bdroom apt. I can't afford to go out and buy a car. I don't know if I can afford to live on my own. The apt is in his name so i will have leave. I am so hurt and confused right now that I don't know what to do with myself. I do have a job but I don't make much money. My credit is shot. Does anyone have any advice? All of this came from an argument that we had on Sunday and now he is saying that he doesn't want to be with someone that he has to argue with...like we argue every day. I have devoted my life to making this man happy and now he does this. What the !@#$%? I am only 25. My family lives 5 hours away from me. I don't really have many friends that i can turn to because they are all married with kids. I can't really impose myself on them. Help, please.
Thanks for listening.
Thanks for listening.

After seven years together, you two have one argument and he wants to separate? No wonder you are in shock. Step one, I think, is to take a few days to take extra special care of yourself while your brain has a chance to adjust. If he wants any legal steps to be taken right away, he can go take care of that himself. You, just breathe, get plenty of rest, eat right.
In a few days, take stock again. Find an open and honest way to double check whether it is still true that he wants you to move out. If so, cancel all joint credit accounts, get your name off his utilities, split any joint savings. You could start looking around for a roommate situation, ask friends. Find out if there is any public transit, find out what living quarters may be near a bus line that can get you to work. And eventually, start thinking about long term goals, you will need a plan to eventually improve your earning capacity. Maybe some kind of further education?
Wouldn't life be nice if could all just get along all of the time???.... HA!
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~