Who's here & Where are you?
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Who's here & Where are you?
| Wed, 04-25-2007 - 12:47am |
Hi everyone... There are lots of new faces, and it seems like I've been so busy lately that I haven't been as in touch here as I'd like to have been.
Tell us who you are, and anything about yourself that you'd like to share and what part of the world you live in.
I'm Karen from Nashville, TN.

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I'm Stephanie from Tennessee. I have three great kids, 2 daughters and a son, ages 9, 6 and 13 months (respectively). STBX and I have been separated since May 2006 (he moved out 4 days after our 16th wedding anniversary - nice, huh?) Our son was born in March 2006 and had to be resusitated at birth. They told us he would die within a couple of hours and IF he survived, he would have severe brain damage. I'm happy to report that they were wrong! He did stay in the NICU for 6 weeks before coming home though and STBX moved out 3 weeks later. He claimed he hadn't been happy for a long time and was tired of trying. He forgot to mention that he had a girlfriend - who was a friend of the family and one of the nurses in the NICU for our son! Apparently, they used my child's illness as an excuse to strike up a relationship.
Anyway, he moved out and lived with his brother for a couple of months and then he moved in with the girlfriend. She had kicked her hubby out 1 week before STBX moved out of my house. They still try to convince everyone that this was just a coincidence, not planned - yeah right! Anyway, he filed for divorce and I signed the papers in October 2006. The divorce was supposed to be final in January 2007 but he stopped it just days before it was to be final. Claimed he wasn't sure about what he was doing, blah, blah, blah. This went on for 3 weeks and then he finally told me that he wasn't planning to move out of her house. I told him to call his attorney and get another court date. After a few more weeks of fence sitting, he brought me an amendment to the original divorce papers wanting to redo some of the financial stuff. I took it to my attorney and got advice, had the papers redone and gave them back to him. Well, here we are weeks later and he has just turned the papers back into his attorney. He has been back and forth constantly about what he wants to do. Hopefully, I'll have another court date soon. We'll see.
He is involved in the kids' lives. He helps take DS to therapy and doctor appointments and he pays his child support and alimony consistently so I guess I can't complain. The older kids are doing OK. They still have a hard time not seeing their dad everyday but they do get to talk to him each night. I am enjoying not having to deal with his moods and the trust issues I had with him even before this. I am also enjoying some free time when he has the kids, which I never had before. He finally gets to see what it's like to take care of them for once (and when he has them, the girlfriend also has her kids so they have 5 to take care of at once!).
I haven't posted much here but I plan to be more involved - I promise!
Stephanie
Hey Stephanie,
I really, really, really enjoy my "free time" when the kiddos are with their dad.
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
I'm Lisa and I live in South Jersey. I've been separated since last August (we just passed our 8 year anniversary on 4/10) and am just waiting for STBX to sign the property settlement agreement before we can finalize this mess. He left me for another woman, who is now having his twins. Neato or what? I was unemployed at the time, (hence the name luvnbnhome), and have just recently had my left hip replaced due to a birth defect (funny how they find those when you are 43 years old, huh?). I have since been substitute teaching and hope to have my own classroom in the fall. Now I need a new screen name, any ideas?
I have one DS, John, who is 5-1/2 and GREAT. He has been a trouper through all of this. We're lucky that stbx was not around much anyway and now since he's moved over an hour away to another state, he only sees DS 1 weekend per month...stbx's idea...what ever.
The board has helped me some days more than others. Everyone has different situations and its good to hear from objective people. I find it to be a great release when I need to vent. My family and friends get sick of hearing about my woes and you guys never seem to.
Although the official process is about done, we still will have to deal with the birth of those kids (my son doesn't know about them yet), stbx's impending marriage to ow (because marriage means so much to him) and I'm going to go through the annulment thing just to satisfy my own need for closure. So, I'll be around for a while.
Nice to meet all of you and I hope to share some happy things with you all in the future!
You're right. The dam bursts when it bursts.
I had one of those tonight. I got a 47 page interogatorie on anything that might be worth a dime in this house. To my shock it didn't exclude two of our most valuable items that should be excluded. Dd#1's clarinet and dd#2's piano.
STBX was here and I cornered him on it and asked about the girls instruments being included thinking it was just an oversight. He told me to "Talk to your lawyer" leaving me to believe he's going after half of their value. I vented big time to ddil before my lawyer called me back and told me he wants to be in that room if he tries to go after the girls instruments in either mediation or court. He'll be crucified.
I'm thinking he's thinking I'll pay him half their value to keep them rather than sell them. I would if I had to but my lawyer says I won't have to. His argument will be that I could sell them but I'm not him so I won't. You don't sell a musicians instrument. Especially their first one. They're too much a part of the musician.
I wish he wasn't so good at yanking my chains. He knows what's near and dear to me and goes right for the jugular. I don't get it. He's the one who walked out. Of course he had this crazy idea we'd stay married but live in separate residences and he'd to his thing while I did mine. Ddil tells me he's still shocked I filed. Why would a man who left and made it clear it was permanent be shocked his wife filed for divorce?
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
hi all
i'm christine. i live in northern va. i filed for d in nov 2006, and finally moved out january. i was married for 20 years. i have two children, my son is 15 and my daughter is 10. my stbx was an unemployed alcoholic who has blamed the demise of our marriage on me.
Hello to you from Southeast Missouri; Becka here. I've been divorced for almost 4 years. I celebrate that date each year when it comes around, Aug. 26. I have one daughter, Lauren (9 on May 25). Just broke up with my boyfriend of 10 months. (He chose the alcohol over me and I don't compete.) Lately I'm playing the waiting game. As of May 1, my ex will be $3300 behind in cs. I haven't received any child support since March 5--he makes $87,000 a year. His wages have been garnished, but I'm waiting for his employer to comply--they have until May 18 to do so. I just got his current address today (He moved 1 1/2 years ago.) so I ordered an insurance card so I can get my dd's meds filled.
He has cut off all communication since I decided to hang up on his wife (atty's orders) when she called my house a couple of weeks ago.
I'm just going to sit back and let him waste his energy trying to make me upset--it's not working anymore. If Lauren wasn't in the middle, I'd find it pretty dang funny.
Catch ya later,
Becka
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
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