Will I ever get over it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2005
Will I ever get over it?
3
Tue, 10-11-2005 - 1:45pm
I am recently seperated. He moved out Aug 20th. I thought we would seperate and then come back fresh to the relationship and work it out. Once he moved out he wouldn't call and I was patient just called a couple of times during the week to see what's up. He never called back. I then heard froma friend that he was seen out with another girl. I found out, the day after he moved out, he went out with this new girl. I was devasted. I couldn't beleive it. I tried calling but no answer, and I even sent email. I know the curse of email. But no reply. I asked him to work it out with me that I never thought it was final and wrote intimate email with promises of a fresh start and everything.
But I found out he forwarded all my email messages to her to read. I'm shocked and so upset. I can't even think straight. Its been over a month and I just can't stop crying. Our town is small and people keep telling me how they see him around with her. I even found out he booked a photographer for their wedding! He's not even divorced yet!
I don't know how to move on. Its been so hard and I'm just so lost. Has anyone experienced this?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2003
Tue, 10-11-2005 - 2:28pm


Yes, I've been there. He kicked me out Aug. 8 moved his gf in 2wks later, and it wasn't the same girl he cheated on me with. It's been very hard, and it still is, but it's something we can do. I've recently started dating a very sweet man, who works out of town, and he helps me he talks to me, he holds me when I cry and I honestly don't think it's a rebound thing. Honey, get out of the house and get moving. Do things with your friends to ocupy your time. I never stop, I don't slow down, I work all day and loaf all evening until bedtime. I'm 26 today and I'm going out tonight with a girlfriend of mine. My mans out of town he won't be back until Oct. 20 but we have to learn to be alone that's the hard part. I've been lonley married never lonely alone, it's totally different. It just takes time, and that's all you got is time. Take time for your self do what ever you want to do. FREE!!! FREE!!! Spread your wings girl and FLY FREE!!!!

Stacy

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2005
Tue, 10-11-2005 - 2:55pm
Thanks! You're right its hard to be lonely alone now, but its real and I'm dealing with it. Where as like you said he's just avoiding it and it will catch up with him one day. I guess I have to learn how to fly again so I can be free.....I do like the feeling of being free.....its a very nice thought....FREE!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
Tue, 10-11-2005 - 9:34pm
You will get over this eventually. But it takes time and patience on your part. You will have good days and bad days, you just have to allow yourself to feel whatever you are feeling, and ralley SUPPORTIVE people around you. The same thing happened to me and its been two years since it happened, one year since I found EVERYTHING out, and I still have my days! Your ex is a coward, just like mine is. He didn't earn his way out of the relationship, he snuck out like a coward. Just like mine did. He may regret it someday. My ex does and is moving back to town to be near the kids, but I think he knows that he screwed up things with me enough that I will never take him back. Life comes full circle sometimes, but unfortunately we don't always get back what we give. Sometimes we give more than we should and get screwed over. Those are all life's lessons, and you will be wiser for the wear. Just be GOOD to yourself and focus on getting through day by day and find little ways to heal your heart, and eventually you will get to a place where you will be okay. Take care. Thoughts and prayers.