Will I?
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Will I?
| Wed, 05-30-2007 - 11:12am |
I understand the title of this msg board of course, but really, will I survive? How?
As broad as the above questions are, even I, being male (am I even allowed here?), have nothing but a sporadic cluster of holes in my inner self that nothing seems to fill. I blame guilt.
I don't necessarily need a shoulder, but I'd sure like to hear a woman's perspective or advice on how to survive the excruciating pain that comes with separation, no matter who initiated it.
Thank You,
M

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Welcome! and YES! you're allowed here. We love the guys here! Just remember not to take offense to the intermittent "all men are pigs" comments.
The way we get through it is day by day. Or by finding the humor in our situations. By the knowledge that we're not alone.
I think that the most important thing is to not underestimate (or overestimate) yourself. We can't do everything, we're not perfect, BUT we're stronger and more capable than we think we are!
Keep coming back.... vent or ask questions. We're all in the same boat.
~calla~ mom to rosie and gracie
Sweetie you are always welcomed here. The pain is the same no matter if you are male or female. We all have souls and hearts and blood in our veins. We all feel. Being one who is going thru a separation I did not initiate I know how hard it is to be on the receiving end. Also, my first husband cheated so I know all too well how crappy it feels to be rejected. My husband is not doing well with it either. Sad. We are in the process of working on things but it does not make it any easier to sleep alone each night. Take it one day at a time. It will get better.
~Melissa~
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Thank you for the advice callalily65, in regards to not taking offense to the AMAP comments. Honestly though, I feel more like swine now than I've ever felt. Gladly this feeling is intermittent though. When I think about how good of a person I want to be, and how daunting the task to reach that peak seems, well, "pig" seems more than appropriate.
I'll take yours and all others' advice. What I take now, I'll give back ten-fold when my strength has returned. I never forget the ones who've helped, ever!
Again, thank you.
M
You could have stopped at "Sweetie" and made a difference in my day. I haven't heard that word in what seems like....... eternity.
Most of my acquaintances, including my family, have left me to fend. My parents do not call anymore (I used to count that as a blessing), anything I say to my siblings gets back to the family in such a way that I wonder if they were listening to me or the Jerry Springer show. My S2BX filters everything I say through the lie strainer and of course nothing comes out of my mouth unless it's a lie - from my feelings, emotions, to you name it.
Anyway, thanks for your first word! And of course, all that followed.
M
~calla~ mom to rosie and gracie
Do? What did I do? I did something for me. I wanted out so I could be or try to be me at the cost of losing everything I've known for the past 12 years. I told everyone no after years of submission and saying yes yes, of course I'll do this and that for you because although my shoulders are weak, I find it in me to help you.
I took the weights of everyone off my shoulders and handed them back, that's what I did.
M
Well, one thing that I learned throughout the divorce process was that the friends I lost because I was getting *horrors* divorced, weren't really my friends after all. Divorce is only a threat to a marriage that can be threatened.
Oh, and my parents weren't thrilled with my decision to divorce, but they got over it.
Everyone makes mistakes and no one is perfect. Remind your family and friends of that fact.
~calla~ mom to rosie and gracie
Mind if I pluck one and take it with me as well? ;)
Thanks rosemile I'll do just what you've mentioned!
M
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