Will I?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
Will I?
33
Wed, 05-30-2007 - 11:12am

I understand the title of this msg board of course, but really, will I survive? How?

As broad as the above questions are, even I, being male (am I even allowed here?), have nothing but a sporadic cluster of holes in my inner self that nothing seems to fill. I blame guilt.

I don't necessarily need a shoulder, but I'd sure like to hear a woman's perspective or advice on how to survive the excruciating pain that comes with separation, no matter who initiated it.

Thank You,
M

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2007
In reply to: house74
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 1:22pm
I guess I misspoke. A better choice of words would have been "I hope you HAVE an ally." I did not mean for you to run out on the street and ask the first person to be your sounding board. Ha Ha. Sorry.
I am going thru a bunch of c**p right now. So my brain is not focused on typing. Or thought.
I just found it easier to have someone to bounce things off of. To get an opinion from someone else, especially when the lowest times came. Someone who knew me. Fortunately I had a great SIL. She was a big help.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
In reply to: house74
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 1:36pm

I am glad for you. Men are more easily deserted in times such as this. Reason being in my case is, everyone thinks I have it all together and since I've always shown strength, why the hell would he need help now.

So I don't show emotions until they begin showing me, that's who I am, who I've had to be. I survived my world 32 yrs. and it wasn't because I caved, or better yet, was allowed to cave. I've got a lot of rough edges and people are intimidated, but when they get over my wall, they've never ever been let down. I take care of my 'people' (not all are friends n family so I can't say friends n family only) and whether or not it is returned is of no circumstance - and that is what I think I need to change about myself.... quit giving so damn much away.

Thanks,
M

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
In reply to: house74
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 1:38pm

hi house

congrats on doing what you felt needed to be done. divorce is never easy, i am the one who wanted my divorce, for many different reasons.

my family has been incredibly supportive, but i have lost many friends. primarily, because my stbx is crazy and calls all my friends for information on me, etc....

they (meaning my friends) don't want to be bothered by a psycho. who can blame them.

what

what

Pages