will the pain ever end?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2008
will the pain ever end?
6
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 1:27am
It was a month ago on the 25th that he asked for a divorce. He has a new girlfriend that is trying to replace me in my 3 yr old sons life. She calls me names and my ex takes our son from place to place. I have no idea where he stays. In fact there are three places he takes our son to stay. I try so hard not to love him still but I come home to an empty house on the weekends ( our son goes to my ex on the weekends). I have court on the 31st. I can't sleep because I keep replaying that day and thoughts of him holding his new gf and here I am in this cold bed alone. I have talked to a church group but nothing can ease my sorrow. I still feel like I need him even though for 5 years it was nothing but "your fat, your f'ing stupid" now it's "no man will want you, your ugly, you never made me happy, (new girlfriend) is more woman than you and makes me happier than you ever did!" I'm broke! My heart, my spirit, my will. Any advice will be greatly appreciated. Right now we can only file for legal separation because we haven't been in CA for 6 months. I have to wait to April to file divorce then another 6 months until it is final! My heart can't take much more!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2007
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 5:01am

Oh man! I cant imagine anyone talking to me, about me, in those terms.


Your self confidence sure takes a hit when a relationship ends, no matter whom leaves whom.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2008
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 7:36pm
Since we moved back to Cali in October I have lost a total of 30 lbs! I lost 15 in one month since he asked me! I do feel better about my body but I still will work more on it! I picked up my son today and he was talking about how the new gf was saying that mommy was mean and that he didn't like it. My ex says I shouldn't believe my 3 yr old but I do. He tells me he slept on the floor again etc. I just can't wait to go to court and get the whole custody finalized! Thank you for you wonderful response!
Avatar for iladyja
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 8:15pm

I agree, get out there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2008
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 8:42pm
MAN! what a jerk! Well I think that right now is your time to lay down rules with your son, you have a right to know that he is safe and that he is in a stable enviorment. I think that you pain will always be there but it will just get easier through time. This is your time now to try and save money and lose weight if needed and get your hair done and do something for you that makes you feel good. Once your happy and his words mean nothing to you(which might take awhile)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 12:04pm

WOW...thought I was reading my story. My ex and I were

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2007
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 12:29pm

As painful as this is, you have got to get your game face on.