Is it possible that my mother is jealous of me?
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|Fri, 05-13-2011 - 7:00am|
I always had a rocky relationship with my mother, she was emotionally and verbally abusive most of my childhood. Then I went to live in another country when I was 22 and we didn't have much contact for 7 years until I returned. I got married when I returned and she seemed a very different person, more happy and non-abusive, so we started to get along well.
But the thing is, since I got married, she started to hang out with my DH's family more, and she has been having some disturbing behaviour, like badmouthing me to my DH's siblings saying I was an awful daughter to her when she was so lovely to me, she puts on a different personality that's clearly not her just for people to like her, and even said to my face that I get along very well with my DH now but on the long run we'll have problems when he gets to know my real me... she even creates scenarios so people like her more than they like me. Very often I catch her looking at me like she hates me... the other day we were in a parent's house that has a swimming pool and I was swimming, then I stopped and looked at her and the way she was looking at me was scaring! It was my DH who noticed this first. It seems that she wants for me to fail somehow in my life and be miserable again like I was when I lived with her, like she cannot handle my happiness. A friend of mine that also knows her says that her behavious looks like she's jealous of me.
I tried to confront her with her behaviour and she just says that she thinks other people should know the real me because they like me and there's no way people can like me! I was in shock hearing this from my own mother. I AM a good person and I have many friends and people that like me. I'm also a genuine person and I don't dress up personalities for people to like me. That's what she does! I'm considering moving away from her because I don't need this in my life. I was just want to live a simple and happy life and have a "normal" mom. If that's not possible, I'll just walk away from her again.
So is it possible for a mother to feel jealous of her daughter? I never felt I'm in competition with her, and for me this is a VERY strange concept since I cannot understand competition between parents and sons! It is so twisted! Thank you.