Advice on b/f's getaway. Thanks
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| Thu, 03-08-2007 - 1:16am |
my b/f wants to go away camping for a few days or a week by himself which is fine, no problem. He says there is no service where he is going so basically no talking for all those days..for some reason i feel myself getting worried like what if he leaves camping after a few days and planned to meet a friend in vegas or some other place where he can party and basically not speak to me for a few days. I do feel he is gonna go camping(he mentioned it a few times already about it)--..but i feel worried about him possibly making other plans too, not telling me b/c i wouldnt be ok with him going to like vegas without me to see strippers etc etc and this would be the perfect way for me to never know. He said he recently said no to a weekend trip with a friend and told me the location. He never points out saying no to stuff like that (b/c i say no to spring breaks in places etc) so i guess that is what triggered me thinking this..Maybe he was trying to get me to completely think he will be going camping(as weird as i may sound). I guess i am thinking--maybe he told his friend no not this weekend but i will be off from work for a few days soon.
Even still, wouldnt that be a time consuming lie? b/c i do believe he will initially go camping but then he would have to leave after a couple of days or possibly go home and get some clothes and catch a plane etc etc etc just seems like so much to me anyway for a person to lie about.
is this something i should even be bothered worrying about? My friend is like if he comes home clean shaven etc etc he is lying but i may not even see him directly when he comes home b/c i dont live with him.

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You're making many, many assumptions and based on nothing substantial. I don't even know why you would think he's planning to do all this stuff.
What's going on here...are you worry-wart or is he deceitful?
i dont think he is deceitful where he would mailiciously do something to hurt me. I caught him in a lie about going out one night..he didn't tell me and completely lied about it..i found out through the questions i asked months later. He said he didn't do it to hurt me and didn't do it to pick up anyone he just wanted to go out and i guess didn't want a hard time or a lot of questions from me. I let it go.
BUT i can't help thinking something else can happen with this trip. I think he understands where i am coming from. Like he wouldnt want me going on a spring break BUT i feel it could be tempting in his situation where he knows we wont be in contact at all with me b/c he says there is no reception.So basically he could go camping for like 2-3 days and then take a plan somewhere. So that is why i just thought this way..Does it seem far fetched to be thinking this way????
>>He said he didn't do it to hurt me and didn't do it to pick up anyone he just wanted to go out and i guess didn't want a hard time or a lot of questions from me. <<
Absolutely. Considering that you've got your knickers in a knot because he won't have mobile reception, I can certainly understand him not telling you where he went a few months ago. He needed to have a night out and for you to not give him grief about it. If you were open to accepting what he wants to do, he wouldn't feel the need to lie.
Back to the issue at hand. Nope, sorry, I still don't make the connection between lack of a mobile phone and him deciding to see strippers.
There MUST be more to this story to have you even contemplating such scenarios. Such extreme lack of trust indicates either your boyfriend is a terrible partner or you need some serious therapy.
But no matter what the cause, your relationship is in serious trouble if you are thinking like this.
I don't mean to seem rude, but you have a pretty vivid imagination. It also seems like you like to keep your bf on a pretty short leash. Let the man go out once in a while and have fun. Maybe likes to be told no all the time.
My bf went to Vegas on a guy trip last year without me, and I didn't complain about it once. I trust him completely. I know I have nothing to worry about. It doesn't seem like you feel the same way about your relationship.
glitter-graphics.com
if you are ok with a b/f going to las vegas without you to party(what else would there be to do there anyway) then that is great. I wouldnt be ok with it no matter who i was with..i feel like a place with that type of atomosphere such as whatever goes on here, stays here and sin city just wouldnt make me feel great. And i know if guys went--more than likely they go to a few strip clubs unless they are totally against them. I am just not comfortable with a b/f going on a weekend type of thing like that. Some may call it a short leash..i really dont think so..a night out at a bar is one thing..but that is totally great if you have no problem with it whatsover.
I guess i do have a vivid imagination but this is what i thought b/c it would be the perfect way to get away with something wouldnt it?
glitter-graphics.com
In Vegas' defense... There's a lot more to do in Vegas than go to strip clubs. LOTS of other non-sex-industry things to do.
Your level of paranoia is not healthy. Your boyfriend hasn't even left town yet, but in your head he's off cavorting with some stripper in Vegas!
You need to get a grip and some professional help before you drive your boyfriend away!
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