advice needed

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2007
advice needed
14
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 1:56pm

My boyfriend and I have broken up and I would like to get him back. He is having an issue with the trust I have for him. I have realized that it’s a problem and would like to change if he ever decides to give me that chance. These trust issues were instilled on me in the beginning of our relationship and have progressed since than. He finally became fed up and now states that he doesn’t think he wants to be in a relationship anymore. What can I do to help myself and possible show him that I’m worth that 2nd chance?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:02pm

Welcome to the board kimmie11479,


What steps are you taking for yourself, to work on the trust issue or your insecurities?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:09pm

Welcome to the board kimmie11479,


You said you started having trust issues in the beginning of your relationship. Did he give you a reason not to trust him? Have you ever had trust issues before this?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:25pm

Well when we first met there was a girl that he was talking to in others ways than friendship. He did tell he that he was dating me and would like to keep it on a platonic level. She persisted to try and use the platonic friendship as an anchor for her own selfish reasons. I comfortable

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:29pm
Yes he did I wrote about it in a reply post. And yes I have but only after a person has given me that reason. It's seems like I look for something or think up scinerios in my head. I'm so ashamed .
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:35pm
Don't be ashamed. After the stunts he pulled with this other girl you had ever reason not to trust him. Why do you want to get back together with him?
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:38pm

Kimmie,


He basically cheats emotionally on you and YOU think you have a problem?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:53pm

He might seen like a creap but he is a great person. I have notice that he has a bit on an issue with attention but when I try to bring it up to deffend myself he ends up taking over the conversastion and I always end up feeling horrible. Even now I think that the only reason that he "doesn't think he wants to be in a relationship right now" is because he would like to persue the girl that came back from kuwait just to see if anything happens. It's eating me up inside and would like nothing more than to resolve both of our issues. I do know I was wrong to snoop in his things.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 2:59pm
Ok I'm not trying to defend him but at the same time these are his replies to me. They are just friends and they use to work together. Nothing was inappropriate these encounters are just every day talk....what friends do all the time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 3:14pm

Do you go on vacation with a guy friend?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2007
In reply to: kimmie11479
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 3:27pm
Well I thank you flame. I'll have to take this time to do some soul searching.

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