Advice Please

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Advice Please
4
Wed, 06-11-2008 - 1:37pm

I have a question - I have been in a relationship for over two years now - mind you this is actually the best relationship I have ever had - very in love totally happy the works - Well everyone is bugging me when are you getting married have you discussed marriage etc etc


I am 38 and I would like to have a child and I would like to marry this man and spend the rest of my life with him but I do not want to pressure him or play games like pull away like many of my friends have suggested - I am too old for that


What do I do -


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
In reply to: mikylyn
Wed, 06-11-2008 - 2:11pm
Two years is a very reasonable amount of time to be together and feel that it is time to take it to the next level. If you are both fine with things the way they are then just go at your own pace and don't let people pressure you. However he should not take it as pressure if after two years nothing is progressing beyond the dating stage and you want to know where it is all leading or get it going in the direction.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Wed, 06-11-2008 - 3:11pm

Welcome to the board mikylyn,


Has the conservation of marriage or children come up in the discussion during the two years that you have been together? I would have think that you would surely have some idea how he feels about the subjects.


I do agree that I don't think you should pull away from him in order to get what you want. The best bet is always open communication. Playing games is never a good idea.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2008
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 06-12-2008 - 7:16am
Why don't you just talk to him about the future?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 06-12-2008 - 11:12am
Have you spoken to him about marriage and kids? Does he want them? If you don't feel comfortable talking to your boyfriend of 2 years about these things then is something wrong in the relationship? Or has he already indicated that he doesn't want to get married?