Am I blind??

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2004
Am I blind??
13
Tue, 07-13-2004 - 7:12pm
I posted about four weeks ago, I was suspicious of my boyfriend... he went to GA, and kissed a girl, long story. I found out and was very hurt and I don't trust him anymore. I gave him a second chance but learned that he was still talking to this other girl who is his best friend's cousin (he went to GA to visit him and she was there, they've known each other for year's). I was upset that he hadn't ended whatever with her...the relationship was dwindling down and I got upset and called her. He freaked out, we got into an arguement which escalated and turned into him putting his hands on me. He put his hands around my neck, pushed me into the bed causing it to break and he crossed the line. I kicked him out, fired him from his job, cancelled his cell phone...got his family as well as my family and friends involved...it turned into a big situation. He left for a few days and came back to all of his stuff packed up. I wanted him gone. After sitting down and talking, he cried said he was sorry for everything and just wanted a second chance. I've decided that although he crossed the line in putting his hands on me, that I love this person and am willing to put myself out there again in hopes that we can move on with the relationship. As a result my parents now know that he has moved back into the apartment and now my mother is upset because I let him put his hands on me and now she's told me that she has "no respect for me". I don't know what to do. I'm tired of the stress of my relationship, I know that I involved people and now I feel as though I have let a lot of people down because I said I was threw with him and that I would not take him back. Am I fool for taking him back? I don't know what to do about the relationship with my parents...help!

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Avatar for lucy4980
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: lizls217
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 7:13pm
The people on this board can only comment based on the information you give in your post. If you want good advice, then you need to give an accurate portrayal of your situation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2004
In reply to: lizls217
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 7:26pm
Absolutely, I agree, but everyone has got to put that perspective in to their answers as well. That is also not the point. When a person asks for relationship advise and gets someone in return saying, "your boyfriend must be a poor father," come on, that is inexcusable, and not just because it happened to me, but because it was off topic and in that person's poor oppinionated judgement. That is all I'm saying!! Let's stay on topic. If we want to help, let's help. Plain and simple!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2004
In reply to: lizls217
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 7:59pm
I appreciate everyone's comments and have looked at both sides...with my family, my friends, what makes me happy and what is best for me is most important. I'm not a "victim" if I choose not to be. I'm a very strong person and yes, I do love someone who crossed the line. The difference is, if I choose to stay with him and it happens again and I stay, then I deserve what happens because I let it happen again. My choice isn't in giving him another chance to do it again, it's giving him the chance to be a better person for himself and for me. People do change...

Only time will tell if I made the right choice or not..and I can live with that. What I want and what makes me happy is what's important to me now. Thanks.

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