Am I right to feel embarrassed?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2003
Am I right to feel embarrassed?
12
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 9:44am

My husband and I went to a friends house to cookout and swim the other day and while there, he drank several beers, all the while talking guy talk with the other guys, you know..the usual for most men, ..naked women, sex, all that comes with that.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2007
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 10:26am
No I don't think you are wrong..it would be embarrassing. You need to talk with him in a mature honest calm way, let him know how it made you feel and talk this out. If he is willing to admit and apologize for his actions then you need to let it go, put it in the past, and continue on with your life. Communication is key in a situation like this. Hopefully he sees the error of his ways and doesn't repeat it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 1:27pm

'..the usual for most men, ..naked women, sex, '


Yikes! I can't imagine my husband and friends talking this way at a party. Does he talk about explicit sex? Anyway what he did was unacceptable. Has he always been this way or did he change recently?


You need to have a conversation with him about respect for your body and your marriage.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2003
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 1:27pm

Thanks for the reply.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2003
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 1:32pm
He will talk about explicit sex every once in a while, of maybe fulfilling a fantasy or something. He hasn't always been this way, but he is now in his late 40's. Sometimes I wonder if it his mid-life crisis showing thru. What ever it is tho, I wasn't comfortable.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 1:42pm

Welcome to the board somebodysgirl,


I don't blame you for being uncomfortable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-1999
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 2:28pm
I can definitely understand why that would be embarrassing and why you would be mad. He is probably ashamed of his own behavior at some level which is why he is afraid to discuss it. I hope he comes around and apologizes to you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2008
Sun, 07-27-2008 - 10:21pm
So he wanted to get kinky in front of friends...he shouldnt have done that without discussing it with you first to see if that is something you would ever want to do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2003
Tue, 07-29-2008 - 6:20am

Well a day or two of silence in my house, I was the one to first speak. I told my husband

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Tue, 07-29-2008 - 12:04pm

Did he say this: (He had hoped I would be after I drank)?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Tue, 07-29-2008 - 1:18pm
I'm just curious: were other people at this party abandoning their swimsuits, or did he want you to bare all as a solo act?

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