anyone got back together with ex??

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2004
anyone got back together with ex??
4
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 6:51pm
Just a question out of curiosity...as I don't think its really possible.

Has anyone out there SUCCESFULLY rekindled a relationship with an ex?

If so under what circumstances and after how long being apart?

Thanks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 9:51pm
I guess it depends on what you consider "successful"...I dated a guy for six months and we started having some problems and fighting all the time. We seperated for a month, then were together for another six months pretty happily. We ended up breaking up because of the same problems though, so I guess you could say it was in the end unsuccessful...but it worked for a while.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 8:54am

Unless you resolve any and all issues that plaqued you while being a couple, its only a matter of time before you will repeat the same arguments over and over again. People tend to forget why they broke up in the first place, placing the relaionship on a pedastal.


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2004
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 12:06pm
Yup, i totally agree.

Someone was posting here for awhile that wanted to get back together with an ex and i said the same thing. You have to distance yourself from the previous relaitonship and IF you get back together be at totally different emotional places in your life.

The hting is most people don't deal with the problems they had in a relaitonship, i.e., a lot of people think that just breaking up is dealing. But unless you realize what role you played and how to change it and then ACTUALLY change it. We are all going to repeat the same patterns over and over.

Thats why i was wondering if anyone HAD actually learnt something from their past relationship, changed it, moved on, and then got back together with someone from their past but in a totally different relationship.

Avatar for aerandel
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 2:59pm
When I first began dating my boyfriend, I realized I had moved into it too soon and still had feelings for my ex. My heart wasn't in the new relationship and I was distant, and I ended up cheating on him (with my ex.) I broke up with him a few days later, I totally broke his heart. I went back to my ex for about 6 months, and then we broke up, for the last time. I realized then that my ex was bad for me, and it was time to move on. I finally healed and when I was ready, the guy that I dumped was willing to give it another try in spite of the heartbreak I caused him. We have had some issues with trust because of what I did to him, but overall things are good now. We have been together now for 5 years and are planning on marriage. It's a complete turnaround from the first time we dated, where I felt out of place and wasn't into the relationship at all. Now I am head over heels in love, with the same man. Sometimes you have the right person, but the wrong timing.