Are we Broken up or what????

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2003
Are we Broken up or what????
3
Wed, 08-18-2004 - 12:50pm
Hey girls (and guys) So me and my boyfriend were together about 3 years and it was getting pretty serious. Everyone started asking him when we were gettign married and he started to pull away (we're only 22). Then we got in an argumetn and he said he didnt want to be together anymore. He said that he just wanted to be alone for now. The thing is that I dont feel like anything has changed. That was months ago and we still act like we are together. We say I love you alot, we hang out like we used to and we kiss and stuff. I know that he doesnt wnat anyone else and that he still loves me but its like he just doesnt want the title anymore. He says we arent together but he also says that we are more than friends. His mother told me I shouldnt be bothered not having the label because his actions speak louder than his words but I would appreciate others opinions. Thanks so much in advance. :)
Lilypie First Birthday tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2003
Wed, 08-18-2004 - 2:30pm
someone, please.... I would like to hear any input even if you think im an idiot lol
Lilypie First Birthday tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Wed, 08-18-2004 - 3:12pm
You would have to ask him. If you are, I'd say his actions don't match his words and while actions speak louder than words, it doesn't mean that he's going to want the same thing you want or view the relationship the same way you do.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Wed, 08-18-2004 - 3:40pm
I think you have fallen into the "womens role rut" 3 years may seem like a long time and it can be hard to walk away feeling like youve wasted your time, but the time you spent together as a couple wasnt wasted...the time you are investing in a guy who wont commit to you is a waste. The sooner you lose him, the sooner you can find a man who loves you and wants the world to know it.

Just because he is continuing an emotional and physical relationship with you does not mean he has good intentions. If he really loved you, he wouldnt have a problem "labeling" your relationship. The only reason to avoid a "label" is to make sure that he can change his mind and run in the other direction without having to say sorry. Technically, if he meets another woman, he has no commitment to you and can do what he wants. Hopefully he hasnt done that already, but keep in mind that if he was really in love with you, he wouldnt care what label you have. Marriage can be scary to alot of people (men and women) but its not a reason to pretend not to be together.