Are we just friends
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Are we just friends
| Wed, 11-14-2007 - 8:01pm |
Hi I am 29 year old female. I work with a 30 year old male in the same department. We are good friends at least I think.
| Wed, 11-14-2007 - 8:01pm |
Hi I am 29 year old female. I work with a 30 year old male in the same department. We are good friends at least I think.
If a guy says "I'm not ready for a relationship" it means he doesn't want a relationship with you.
You'll have to break the ice somehow, you can't go on being awkward to one another forever! It wouldn't hurt to say "sorry if things are awkward now, I'm not really sure of what to think about what happened"
I don't pretend to understand people in general, but I do know a thing or two about shy guys. You might call me a bit of an expert...
Telling others that he doesn't want a relationship isn't necessarily a bad omen. If I were you, I'd be concerned, but don't give up hope. Shy guys don't like to talk about how they feel. There's a good chance that he only told this person he wasn't interested because he really couldn't let the cat out of the bag.
You need to find out how he really feels, so here's the short and long of it... Ask. Try to get him outside of work again, and ask him what's up. Something along the lines of, "I would love to take things further, but if you don't want to, I don't want it to affect our friendship." Let him know that there's no pressure, and then you'll get to the bottom of things. As a bonus, if you don't find a new lover, you'll at least have a decent friend. Who knows? For shy guys, a friendship is an excellent way to start a real relationship.
I think guys with sincere interest don't get scared and don't use some line about how they are not ready for a relationship.
If I were you, and knowing that he's shy - i would email him to discuss things.
Welcome to the board ivil_gypsy,
First, you already got some good ideas on how to approach him both in conversation and email.
I agree with the let him do the pursuing part.