BF and super fun party friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
BF and super fun party friend
15
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 11:46am

I've been with my BF for 4 months. Before we met, he was hanging out with his 'super fun' friend. She is married, but in a weird open marriage where she and her spouse spend lots of time apart. When my BF was single, the

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 12:56pm

Welcome to the board ashley,


Since this is bothering you, you need to talk to your bf about this. Chances are since they were friends before he met you he isn't going to end the friendship. Suggest that they limit the number of times they go out together in a week. Let him know how this makes you feel.


Good luck.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 2:17pm
how do i tell him it bothers me without sounding like a jealous psycho? it bothers me that he's out having fun with her and doing things that I would like to be doing with him...
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 2:30pm

::it bothers me that he's out having fun with her and doing things that I would like to be doing with him...


:: Tell him exactly that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 3:34pm
i'll talk to him about it, but my job requires 80 hours a week, so not much i can do about finding more time
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 3:49pm
You can go back to having your late dinner once a week like you did before she came back.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 5:41pm

Welcome to the board ashley856,


I agree with Coltara and would suggest you start a conversation - somewhere in there "I really miss our late night dinners once a week, can we start doing that again?"

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 9:30pm

'lots of fun.'


Did this fun involve anything sexual?


Tell him that you miss your own fun with him and when can you plan your nex late dinner. Don't even mention her name. Do you see him on weekends?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
Fri, 09-21-2007 - 10:46am

no. no sex.


we used to do things on the weekend....now she tags along. she calls and says 'hey, let's to go do whatever' and he says 'ok' and the three of us go. it's really strange.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
Fri, 09-21-2007 - 10:48am
no, it's not comfortable feeling like an extra. she acts like a child...he was my friend first. whenever we are together it's always, 'hey, remember that time that.....'
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Fri, 09-21-2007 - 12:33pm

Maybe you should find her a boyfriend ;)


Anyway, let him know that you miss spending weekends with him alone. Try not to get defensive or even mention her name.

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