BF and the weight issue

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2004
BF and the weight issue
7
Tue, 03-13-2012 - 10:24pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Wed, 03-14-2012 - 12:16am

You deserve to vent!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Wed, 03-14-2012 - 12:51am

Mouse, he's absolutely correct about

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Wed, 03-14-2012 - 12:59am

Mouse, I thought I remembered your name and looked back in our history.

Avatar for ukgirl82
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2005
Wed, 03-14-2012 - 7:34am
Read this article on warning signs that you're dating a loser: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171

Note number 4 "Killing Your Self Confidence":

" "The Loser" repeatedly puts you down. They constantly correct your slight mistakes, making you feel "on guard", unintelligent, and leaving you with the feeling that you are always doing something wrong. They tell you that you're too fat, too unattractive, or don't talk correctly or look well. This gradual chipping away at your confidence and self-esteem allows them to later treat you badly - as though you deserved it. In public, you will be "walking on eggshells" - always fearing you are doing or saying something that will later create a temper outburst or verbal argument."

Now this article is about abusive, controlling, and manipulative partners and he may not necessarily fit that profile in entirety - maybe only in this one regard of killing your self confidence. Regardless, it's my belief that anyone who matches even ONE of these red flags should be a goner from your life.

It also concerns me that he seems to think your chosen exercise style isn't "true exercise". This suggests that he thinks his way is always the "right" way and he will constantly try to "correct" your ways in more regards than just this one, unable to accept that is it not a matter of "right and wrong". How long have you been together? Has he ever been critical of you in other, smaller ways? Maybe about things you blew off because you thought it's such an insignificant thing, it doesn't matter?

There is NOTHING wrong with your weight. You are a perfectly healthy and attractive weight for your height. In fact, if you lost even only about 10lbs, you'd be considered underweight. Please don't stay with a man who only makes you feel horrible about yourself. He's an insensitive, hurtful individual and with your history of an eating disorder, he is actually a very big danger to your psychological and and physical health as his constant, irrational criticism of your weight could trigger you back into an eating disorder.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 03-14-2012 - 11:36am

When I first started reading this post, I assumed you were going to tell us you weighed about 200 lbs or something--then when I read your height & weight, my reaction was what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Fri, 03-16-2012 - 1:38am
At that height and weight you are NOT by any means overweight. Sounds like he is just looking for something to be a jerk about. I would dump this loser if I were you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2007
Fri, 03-16-2012 - 12:51pm
Lol !

Even though in the old format it was easier to find old posts, its not difficult in this one as well.