Boyfriend caught cuddling with my friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2004
Boyfriend caught cuddling with my friend
8
Sun, 01-22-2012 - 3:46pm

Should I be upset?
My boyfriend came with me to a weekend trip to see my old friends.While we were in my friends hotel room visiting,I went go use the bathroom and I could hear the conversation going on in the other room between my boyfriend and my friend that he just met."Oh I wish I could get under the covers but she (meaning me) will get mad and I might even get a chubby".
I come out of the bathroom and he is in bed with her,holding one another.Even tho She was under the blankets and he was on top I was VERY uncomfortable coming in the room and seeing this,but he stayed in bed until he knew I was upset.He gets up and says I was just joking and stormed out of the room for the rest of the night.He is now pist off at me because I looked upset,as I really am.Am I wrong for being upset? I do know one thing.If he came in the room and saw me in bed with another guy he would kill me!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2010
Sun, 01-22-2012 - 4:37pm
Sounds like he has boundary issues. Either that or he was hoping for some menage-au-toi (sp?) action (lol). He shouldn't have stormed out of the room like that. Maybe he was embarrassed and didn't know what to do? In any case, it was inappropriate and you have every right to be upset. And why was your friend encouraging his behavior? They were both wrong and should apologize for making you feel bad.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Sun, 01-22-2012 - 5:51pm
Were you all drunk? Because that is all I van think of to explain his behavior. Now you need to calmly and rationally tell him that what he did bothered you, and whether that is right or wrong is NOT up for discussion because you are entitled to your personal boundaries..if he isn't willing to accept that and respect it, then he can find a new girlfriend. And maybe you should find a new friend. "i was just joking" is the #1 male excuse for bordering on cheating.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Sun, 01-22-2012 - 11:49pm

First of all, you need a new boyfriend and a new friend.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Sun, 01-22-2012 - 11:53pm
This guy sounds really immature and if I were you I'd think about finding a new BF. Joking around... REALLY!!! This was suppose to be funny. Maybe to a 16 year old guy it would be. How old are you and your BF anyhow?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2004
Mon, 01-23-2012 - 1:21am
Im 38 and hes 49
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Mon, 01-23-2012 - 1:34am
49??? Well then I really stand by what I said about immature. I was honestly thinking you/he were like college aged. Really, this sounds like something that would happen in a college dorm after a party where everyone had too much to drink. Maybe it's time to seriously start thinking about cutting this guy loose.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Tue, 01-24-2012 - 4:23pm

The fact of the matter is you were upset and for good reason. Both of their behavior was inappropriate and they are old enough to know better. The I'm pissed at you because you are pissed at me is the oldest trick in the book, it is meant to get you off the real subject which was his making a move on your friend and your friend being into it.

You need to consider the fact if he would behave so inappropriately with you close by what the heck will he do when you aren't around. I actually had to threaten to end a friendship with one of my girlfriends because her boyfriend kept putting the moves on me and

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Wed, 01-25-2012 - 3:46am

49??