Boyfriend shorter than me

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2005
Boyfriend shorter than me
8
Thu, 07-12-2007 - 2:38pm

Hi All,

I´ll try to keep this post short and to the point. Thank you all in advance for reading it!

I hate to sound shallow but my boyfriend is about 4 inches shorter than me...it doesn´t bother me most of the time but lately it´s been on my mind a lot. He´s absolutely amazing, we live together and have a puppy, we´ve been together a year, and we live in South America. People on the street give us a fairly hard time about the height difference here but my friends told me it wouldn´t be such a big deal in the US.

Which is another issue...I´m going back to the US in a year and hoping to bring him with me. However, that is a fairly big commitment. Sometimes I get to thinking about the fact that I can´t wear high heels (although he says it doesn´t bother him) or that I have to ´hug-down´and it makes me sort of sad (not the right word but I can´t think of another one right now...). Our relationship is really wonderful and I can see a future with this man, I just wonder if the height thing will continue to bother me or fade away?

I don´t know what I'm looking for here...maybe some advice or some similar stories?

Thanks for your time!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Thu, 07-12-2007 - 8:54pm
Ummm--similar stories. Yeah. How much taller is Katie Holmes than Tom Cruise? And she's not embarrassed.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-13-2007 - 10:01am

My boyfriend is shorter than me too! I'm 5'7 and he's about 5'4. It's no big deal for us. People gave us trouble early on, but it's been 5 years now and it's just normal to us. Without shoes, I can wrap my arms around his neck to give him a hug and we can see eye-to-eye. I love it! I have dated taller men and that's all fine and good. But this man is one in a million and I'm keeping him, regardless of height.

I live in the US and it doesn't seem to be a big deal here. We see many couples that look like us when we're out. So it doesn't seem like a big issue to me!

Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2007
Fri, 07-13-2007 - 10:13am
Thanks so much for that! I figure it´s not as big a deal in the US....now I just have to worry about my family!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2003
Fri, 07-13-2007 - 8:37pm

Let me tell you something about tom cruise. He's actually 3'6" tall. Its all public relations and camera angles.

Besides, Katie is approaching 30, so Tom is going to flush her away pretty soon. I'm betting that Dakota Fanning, his costar from the martian movie and wife number 4, will just about turn 18 when Katie reaches the decrepid age of 30 or 31.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Fri, 07-13-2007 - 8:54pm
lol. I couldn't agree more!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2007
Sun, 07-15-2007 - 9:10am
ignore the people who cant handle you being taller.My man is 3 inches shorter than i am...he really loves it when i wear high heels.Its what the 2 of u are comfortable with not what others think.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
Sun, 07-15-2007 - 11:21pm

This might be the wrong thign to think, but I think it anyway: Whenever I see a short man with a tall woman, I always think, "He must be amazing in bed." I also always think he must be absolutely confident of himself in a good way.

I think part of that is because the best boyfriend I ever had was my exact height, and since I love to wear heels, he is always a tad shorter than me when we go out. He was both of the things I mentioned before. ;-) I always dated taller guys before, but because of this one boyfriend's character and personality, he stands head and shoulders above the rest as far as i'm concerned ;)

My feeling is the more you wory about it, the more of a big deal you 'll make of it. So stop thinking about it and appreciate the perfect fit when you're with him.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2007
Mon, 07-16-2007 - 10:05am

Thank you everyone for your suggestions and kind words (and feel free to keep them coming!) I think you're right; the more you think about it the worse it is. We just spent an amazing weekend with some friends who are visiting from the US and I realized (all over again, as I do almost every day!) how lucky I am to be with a man so incredible.

My only obstacle now is a) getting him to the US and b) getting my family to accept him (they know of him but they're skeptical...for the height and because I think they feel I support him, which is absolutely not true because he earns more than I do!)

And to the poster who talked about sex and self-confidence, I can say without a doubt that it is ABSOLUTELY true in my case!!!

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