Calculated Risk?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2007
Calculated Risk?
3
Tue, 10-30-2007 - 6:55pm
My husband and I have been together for over 5 years. He's 34 and I'm 26. He's always had a fascination with becoming a filmmaker. He's spent thousands of dollars of our money buying equipment and books over the years and always kept lower level jobs, like security guard, so that he could somewhat contribute financially but still have plenty of time to do what he loves. I've worked very hard in my job and am currently the bread winner. Currently we are four months pregnant. Upon finding out that he was going to be a father, my husband decided he needed to do something about his career. I was thrilled to hear this until I found out that is plan was to spend $45,000 we don't have getting a Masters Degree in Fine Arts so that he can make movies. The friend in me wants him to be happy and I want to support his decision but the wife in me needs a man I can depend on who will put his baby first and choose a more stable and likely career. I don't know how to justify spending that kind of money with the baby coming. I have nicely told him I think he should choose a more family friendly path but now I just feel him pulling away from me. My heart is breaking and I don't know what to do. I don't want to take away his dreams, but at what cost? I really feel like the baby has to come first. Any advice or perspective?
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
In reply to: ckhemmer
Tue, 10-30-2007 - 7:41pm

Not much in the way of advice, but I think I can give some perspective.

It is not enough to have a good mind.  The main thing is to use it well.-- Rene Descartes

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
In reply to: ckhemmer
Wed, 10-31-2007 - 1:38pm

Welcome to the board ckhemmer,


Does your husband plan to work while obtaining his masters degree? Would he be paying for school by taking out student loans?


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: ckhemmer
Wed, 10-31-2007 - 3:07pm

Welcome to the board ckhemmer,


I think you've already been given good advice.... the part about a dream ending and him wanting it RIGHT NOW, while that's normal, his priorities are a little off with a baby on the way.