Can this relationship be saved???
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Can this relationship be saved???
| Wed, 03-17-2004 - 1:33pm |
About 3 months ago my boyfriend broke up with me. I was really hurt over it and we were arguing heavily on the phone about it. Well he got fed up and told me he cheated on me with a coworker of mine. Right after that he told me he was just saying it so I would hate him becuase he didn't want me to cry over him. He was also using drugs here and there. Now he is clean and we haven't had any problems whatsoever but the thought of him cheating on me is still in the back of my mind. I want to beleive that he just told me that to hurt me but a part of me thinks he did cheat. He swears he would never do that to me and the girl he supposedly cheated with laughed it off becuase she can't stand him. She has heard about how he treated me in the past and didn't like him from the begining. I just don't know what to believe. They both say they didn't do anything and I want to believe him but I am just so confused. What should I do? I want to be able to trust him and work things out, we've been together for 4 years and I don't want to throw it away for something I beleive happened when it didn't but also don't want to waste any more years if it did.

First both of you need to be in counseling...him for drugs and the both of you together for some couples counseling. Even if he didnt cheat on you, what a rotten things to say to upset you. That in itself makes me question his maturity for any relationship.
Whether or not you are going to be able to trust him is your call and only one you can make. Know that deciding to forgive doesnt necisarrily mean that you forget-but it does mean that you cant continue to throw this issue in is face, so make sure that when and if you do forgive, that you are ready too.
A relationship shouldnt be about who can hurt who the worst, but about being each others strength and working as a team..