Cell Phones and Cheating

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2007
Cell Phones and Cheating
6
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 1:26am
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 8:11am

You have to worry about it. Exes that text one another about jealousy in a relationship and "missing" one another are not innocently intended.

He's not going to like that you went through his phone, but in order to talk about this (and you need to), it will be obvious what you did. So apologize for it at the start of the conversation. Then you need to talk about what kind of behavior/talk is and is not acceptable with an ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend.

If he doesn't want to adhere to what you think is right (and I don't think what he's saying to her is at all "right") then you need to really think about why you're with him. After only 6 months this isn't a great sign. You have a right to your own expectations in a relationship and if he can't/won't meet them that's something to consider.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 2:27pm

Welcome to the board angelhill99,


I agree with eggbertshootsfire. He's already crossing the line with the kind of text messages they are sending each other.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 7:39pm
These are some red flags for an emotional affair. I would be concerned if I were you.

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I am unable to give legal or medical advice. My opinions are based on my experiences and my personal research.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2007
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 9:32am

Thank you everyone for your advice.


I finally got to talk to him about it and he said that he does still have feelings for his ex. He said that he does love me, but he can't be with me and hurt me anymore knowing that he has lingering feelings for her.


I asked him if he thought it would work out between them and he said it probably wouldn't.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 12:06pm

I feel so bad for you angelhill99.

Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 12:57pm

Well, each indivdual has to decide for themselves how comfortable they are with their partner's having a relationship with an ex. In this particular case, it seems to me that it has gone over the line. The quotes you describe are intimate emotionally. It is perfectly normal for you to feel uncomfortable about this. Even if they haven't had a sexual relationship, there are different levels of personal intimacy that are appropriate when one is in a relationship with someone else.


You have to be true to yourself here. You have a right to feel respected, safe and loved in a relationship. If you are bothered