cheated w/ escorts!!!
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cheated w/ escorts!!!
| Wed, 04-25-2007 - 4:05pm |
Okay, I don’t know where to start. My bf & I just celebrated our 2 year anniversary you would think that all the trust is in tact but unfortunately for me, I have been feeling kind of off. My bf and I have sex pretty much once every 3 months which is horrible for me. We used to have so much fun and were intimately inseparable. Now I hear no more than most people could bear. Now he says that life doesn’t revolve around sex. That was a low blow because I didn’t want to make him feel like he was some sort of sex object. We are happy, we talk all the time, we see each other everyday, and we talk about the future. Recently he hasn’t been talking about the future as much unless I bring it up. Well, to get straight to the point, I snooped in my bf email account the day before our anniversary and I found emails that just ripped my heart out. My bf states that he doesn’t watch porn or any of that stuff and I had confronted him about it before but he never fesses up to even when I proof. But this it 3 times worse. He has been emailing individual escorts or incall/outcall sessions, and asking are they in a house. condo or hotel and in one email he even states that he has had a particular girl/escort for 2 years. This means that he has not been faithful for the entire time that we have been together. I love this man to death and have fully committed to him but how do I talk to him about this???? How do I tell him "hey, I invaded your privacy and are you cheating on me?" Should I just let the relationship go? I love him to death but this has really placed everything on really shaky grounds for me. I don’t even know how he could be cheating when we are always together. Now that I know this I have been in a funk and have been stand offish with everyone especially my bf. I wished he could have just told me. Now I am always suspicious. I have checked his emails and have not seen any new updates but then again it has only been 4 days. Honestly what hurts the most is that he lied and that I have been putting myself out there (sex wise) and his chooses an escort over his own gf. I'm an intelligent, beautiful young woman that has a lot to offer but right now I can’t help but doubt myself and feel that I pushed him away. Someone help. I need some insight on this situation. Please no angry I hate men comments. I just want some honest, genuine opinions.

Welcome to the board kserena,
My thinking is in
glitter-graphics.com
The trust is gone...w/o trust there is nothing left...
what do you want to do about it?
Why confront him when you've all ready got the proof and you know that when you confront him about it that he will probably just lie to you since he has no problem cheating on you either...
He CANNOT be trustewd and he has been fine having his needs met elsewhere while you suffer feeling neglected and now you're down on yourself because of HIS behavior. It's not a matter of "hating" men it's a matter of recognizing that a liar cannot be trusted and generally speaking "once a cheater always a cheater." He has made you feel wrong for desiring sex with him - well of course you desire sex with him - he's your boyfriend. There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to have sex with your boyfriend and if he wasn't betraying you, you would have had a healthy sex life.
If you hear anything - hear this - this IS NOT your fault. You are a beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves an honorable man. He's not it. You could hold on with hope, you could try to guess what he might want or need and hope you can measure up but cheaters can't be satisfied and no one is ever enough.
Personally, I would confront him to tell him why it's over. You may get crap for snooping but I am a firm believer that sometimes we just know so we seek the proof and while it may be beneath us in every way the need to know will not be denied. Our sense of self almost demands it.
It is possible that the steady girl he is referring to is you but that doesn't change the fact that he is sniffing around to see what else is out there, all the while shutting you out.
Good luck.
I would have no problem confronting my girl if I had proof... after all how can they even dream of complaining about you snooping.. while they are decieving you?.. I rather be a snoop then a cheat and on top of that.. there was a reason for you to snoop.. cause he was doing you wrong!!!