Children..Is it a true deal breaker ladies?
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|Mon, 07-30-2012 - 8:59am|
Just wanted to ask if it is a true deal breaker if one partner does not want children. I have alot of 30yr old single female friends that claim if they were with the 'one' and he decided he did not want kids they would leave the relatiohnship.
Now I do have a child and since my divorce dated a special person and now have lost someone I loved deeply because she wanted a child someday and I did not. It was literally the only thing we could not see eye to eye on.....For me it was hard to start down that road of baby time and diapers again after already doing it once. Plus I am fearful of blended families etc... Not an easy break up and still question my decsision. Deep down I would be doing it for her and I know that is not fair and love her enough to let her go and find what she is looking for. We both agreed we had found the 'one'
So I guess I get stuck on the idea that you should put your relationship first(to be the best you can for your children), you will be with this person to the end after the kids leave home but in essence the relationship ended over a baby that is not even born...... So to me she was loving something more than me that doesnt even exsist.... what would happen when we actually had the baby, would I not be chop liver I wonder if she would have said we were more important and needed to work it out if It would have motivated me to share that experience with her someday.... I do love being a father and cherish every minute. Selfish to already have one and not let someone I love experience it as well...... So tricky....